| Freeze Frame |

Letting Go

I’ll look for times when relinquishing control left room for healthy and growth-filled moments


What this means

There’s an issue I often struggle with that blankets itself over my mothering and spreads itself through many other areas of my life as well: My need for control and my desire to know what will happen next. I find this hinders my acceptance of my children and my acceptance of life in general, as I constantly want to control the variables to soothe my own worries.

To combat this need for control, I try to seek out the times that my lack of it has brought about a beautiful or interesting conclusion. I’ll look for times when relinquishing control left room for healthy and growth-filled moments.


To Do

Find an area of your life or parenting in which you feel particularly uptight. Take a picture of the child or situation that highlights your need for control, or take a purposefully blurred image to remind you of this idea, and write about what you see when you manage to let go.

“This can be as simple as letting your child make a mess while she bakes or get muddy while he plays outside. Or it can be something deeper, like working to accept parts of your child’s personality or your own shortcomings.”

  • “It was one of those long and hot days, when I didn’t want to push myself too much. But somehow I did anyway. We went on a hike.

“I tried to balance on a slippery rock peeking out of the creek, but my feet were ankle-deep in water, the baby was squirming in one arm, and my camera was slung over the other. There was a cloud of pesky fleas determined to follow me, and behind me the other children were asking for a steady hand.

“I was sticky and tired. I wanted to go home. And yet we stayed, and you thrived, soaking in the nature and the endless opportunities it holds.

“Later, in the quiet following the bedtime chaos, when our shoes were still drying outside the front door and the muddy socks were piled next to the washing machine, I saw this image, blurry but oh so clear. A pause amid the noise. A fleeting slice of silence. The kind of fragment in time that reminds me that giving you — and myself — the opportunity to explore is always worth the effort.”


(Originally featured in Family First, Issue 761)

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