She wasn’t entitled to time off — Suri was almost two — but really, to suggest she was doing her child harm by sending her to a babysitter?

“H ow was Suri today?” Tamar asked her younger sister Ruchy as she scooped up her daughter.

Ruchy handed her babysitting charge over. “She was great.” She paused. “What did you think of the rav’s speech last night?"

“I dunno” Tamar said quickly. “I didn’t really think about it.”

“Really?” Ruchy sounded incredulous. “Me and Shua were up all night talking about it. Writing a will is like big-people mature stuff and it’s really nice that they’re bringing in a lawyer to discuss things and make it all official ‘cuz like even if I thought of doing it if there’s official paperwork involved it’s not happening.”

Tamar looked around for something to distract her. “Ruchy you didn’t snap her undershirt again. Seriously it takes a second and now she looks homeless walking around with flaps coming out from under her shirt.”

Ruchy looked at her mildly. “Anything else I’m doing wrong your majesty?”

“Whatever,” Tamar said. “I gotta run. See you tomorrow.” She gathered her daughter’s stuff didn’t bother putting on her sweatshirt.

“Wait — what are you wearing to Ma and Ta’s anniversary party? I wanna wear the blue top that you have in green.”

Tamar looked at her sister and practically snorted. “That’s two seasons old. You can wear it.”

Ruchy was unfazed. “Thanks, doll.”

It was a short e-mail. New family-leave policy. Meeting at 1:30 in the main conference room. She didn’t want to go she always came back to work before her maternity leave was up anyway and when the kids were sick her sister stepped in. But she had to go because she was management, positive role model and all that stuff.

The meeting was brief — but enthusiastic. They were now offering three weeks of paid paternity leave and twelve weeks of paid maternity leave. And there was stuff for sick parents and siblings and kids and time off making it easier for mothers. “Most progressive company in New York ” the CEO crowed while the HR people stood at his side with gummy smiles.

Again, it made no difference to her she never used these things go be progressive in an area that made a difference to her — financially. Then people could afford nannies and stuff and wouldn’t be bothered with half of this family-leave stuff.

The room emptied and Tamar sat there. Seriously, it was like the world was messing with her. She wasn’t entitled to time off — Suri was almost two — but really, to suggest that she was doing her child harm by sending her to a babysitter? Like HR thought that an extra three weeks was going to make a difference. If they really cared about kids’ futures they’d let moms go on hiatus for two years. This trying to have it all — corporate success and mommyhood — was just confusing. 

***

She leaned against Ruchy’s kitchen counter, when she went to pick up Suri that afternoon. She instantly regretted it, feeling something wet seep and spread on her back.

“It’s just water.” Ruchy waved her hand. “It spilled and I didn’t want to go downstairs to get another pack of paper towels, so I figured it’ll just evaporate eventually.”

“It has to be hot enough to evaporate,” Brachi said dryly.

“Yeah, whatever. What’s up?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re usually running, and now you’re leaning against my counter like you have all the time in the world.”

“Don’t be so perceptive.”

Ruchy smiled at her older sister. “Whatever. Hello, Brachi, how you doing? Can I give you a drink of water? I can just siphon it off my counter.”

Brachi bit her lips before she spoke, “Do you think it really makes a difference if a mother is home when the kids are young? I mean like, why is a doting babysitter like an aunt not good enough?”

Ruchy huffed out a laugh. “Uh, lady, you’re looking at the babysitter — who’s partially a babysitter by choice because she wants to be with her kids, and because she refused to go to college and this is the best it gets.”

“Okay, whatever. But isn’t this the age when they’re just learning the basics? ABC, 123, don’t fight, do share. Can’t they learn that from a devoted babysitter, do they really need Mommy to teach them this stuff? It’s only when they’re older that they need the real parenting.”

Ruchy sighed. “I dunno, you’re the one with the degrees. For me, this just feels right. I didn’t really consider much else. For you. I don’t know.” She paused, looking her sister in the eye. “Why are we talking about this?”

“They have new family-leave policies at work — great ones really. The HR person was going on about bonding, and I’m wondering if I’m missing something. Like, everything seems good and happy to me, but these policies makes me feel like maybe I shouldn’t feel this way.”

“If they’re just making you feel bad, then forget about it. But if it makes you feel better, I’ll be sure to give Suri an extra hug a day.”

“Yeah, whatever.” Brachi trailed off. “I gotta get home. Put supper in the oven, spend some time with Breindy and Frady.”

“The ones that count,” Ruchy said.

“Very funny.” Brachi didn’t laugh.

***

“I don’t want to do this,” Brachi whined

“You’ve been pushing this off for weeks,” Yitz stated. He wasn’t budging this time. They sat at their dining room table, late at night, the kids were asleep — they’d made sure of that. “It’s really not a big deal.”

“Not a big deal? Are you serious?! This is a huge deal! This is our lives.”