I was in the mall the first time it happened. I began to feel lightheaded and faint. I looked for a place to sit down, while questions swirled around my brain. Was I having a panic attack? Was it because I was pregnant? Maybe I was dehydrated? I took a drink of water, but the sensation didn’t let up. Twenty minutes later, I finally felt better enough to get up, get in my car, and drive home.

In the car, I thought about what I’d experienced. As a social worker, and someone with a generally more anxious personality, I wondered if the sensations I’d had were related to some sort of anxiety or panic disorder.

I experienced this sensation a few more times over the next few years, but it always seemed to resolve quickly before I could really put a finger on what was going on. Also, as a busy mother, I didn’t have too much time to dwell on what was happening.

Six years after the first incident, shortly after moving to a new community, things began to escalate. Our family was eating Shabbos lunch at a friend’s home when suddenly, right after Kiddush, I started feeling faint and lightheaded again.

Heart pounding, I excused myself to the restroom and took some deep breaths, but nothing seemed to help. I began to panic. Was there something wrong with me? Why did this keep happening? After what seemed like an eternity, I began to feel better and returned to the meal.

The episodes began to become more frequent: In the library, in the grocery store, even while driving — and always out of the blue. Unpredictable in both coming and going, they usually didn’t last long, but always left me feeling rattled and confused.