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Top 5 Ways to Tell if You’re a Gvir


nce in a while people may quietly ask themselves: Am I a gvir? It’s an uncomfortable question to ask and it can be even trickier to answer. Here’s a list that can help you figure out if you really have that coveted gvir status.


Shiur Klali

You were invited to give a shiur klali in a yeshivah, but you can’t really read Aramaic. If you’re not rosh yeshivah material, but you still find yourself on the mizrach wall, it’s a fair sign that you’re probably a gvir.

Pre-Bar Mitzvah Tax Returns

Does your 11-year-old have an accountant? If your children under the age of bar mitzvah fill out tax returns, I’ve got good news — you’re a gvir!

Mazel Tov! 

When your daughter got engaged, mosdos took out ads in the newspapers to wish you mazel tov. Sure, they’re happy for you, but they also blew your cover. Yup, everyone now knows you’re a gvir.

Very Comfy

No one is going to come outright and call you rich. This isn’t the Hamptons. Instead, pay attention to descriptions like “VERY comfortable.” If their eyes widen when they say an emphatic “very,” they’re not describing your mattress.

A Cappella

How often have you hired a large chassidic choir to sing at a family simchah? Have you ever had an
a cappella choir come just for a regular Shabbos? Unless your son is in the choir, consistent
a cappella accompaniment is a good barometer for gvir-ness.

(Originally featured in Mishpacha, Issue 682)


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