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o I spell Chanukah correctly? If you really wanted, you could probably spell Chanukah a different way on each of the eight nights. Here are my top 5 ways to spell Chanukah and what it tells us about the speller

#1. Chanukah

This is the old-fashioned ArtScroll spelling of Chanukah. You’re a classical speller. You keep “Shabbos” and follow “halachah” — no new age, modernish spellings for you. Chanukah spelled any other way would be a victory for the Yevanim.

#2. Hanukah

Hanukah — yeah, one K — an old-fashioned American. This Judaic spelling is as patriotic as apple pie and a Maxwell House Haggadah. Here’s to hoping that Grandma Beatrice remembers to slip that $18 check into her Hanukah Hallmark card.

#3. Hanukkah

The double-K Hanukkah comes from someone who quickly double-checked the spelling on Wikipedia rather than be left adrift with some renegade spelling. Double-K Hanukkah says I make the extra effort to find out common linguistic practice. Behind every extra “K” for Hanukkah is someone with strong opinions about whether to use an Oxford Comma.

#4. Hannuqa

Much like the academic study of Qabala, using a Q in Judaic terms is an easy way to announce to your friends how academic you are. Your menorah was probably uncovered during an archeological dig in Iraq. At your Hannuqa party, your answer to the famous question of the Beis Yosef begins with “Actually, in the original manuscript…” L’Qaim!

#5. Chanuka”h

Using quotes to separate the chaf and hei (in Hebrew, of course) is what separates you from all the others who don’t appreciate the deeper Kabbalistic secrets of this Yom Tov. Did you place them there to signify a gematria? Roshei teivos? This sod can only be revealed to the select group of Kabbalistic spellers.

(Originally featured in Mishpacha, Issue 689)