He took the last few green beans off the platter and shoved them into his mouth, as if he were in yeshivah and they were short on food, and said, “Come on, what’s the matzav with Uncle Heshy and the old guys here? The oilam in yeshivah says there’s politics.”

She froze and turned around to fully face him. She hoped none of the girls would come in now.

“The oilam in yeshivah says what?”

Leizer knew he had her. “My second-seder chavrusa has an uncle here, and Granitzky, who sits next to me during breakfast, has grandparents here too. The oilam’s saying that it’s maaajor action around here. Bnei Brak kav.”

“Tell me, tell me, tell me,” she said, sounding way more eager than she’d have liked to.

Of course Brachi came in at that second, all eager to help, as if she’d been doing this all night. Her eyes narrowed at the sight of her mother and son huddled together.

Shaindy smiled brightly. “Hi, sweetie, I could use another set of hands here,” she said and started to arrange the main course on the large tray.

Chaim made a speech and everyone came in to listen. Shaindy sat perched on the edge of her chair so that it was clear that she was the caterer, party planner, and wait staff, with little help from others. She couldn’t afford to sit.

Chaim said a beautiful devar Torah — a little too long, Shaindy thought, but okay, everyone seemed to enjoy. He spoke glowingly about his eishes chayil, who had given him the same gift of menuchas hanefesh in this new home as she had back in Brooklyn, and she made sure to receive the compliment graciously.

Let her daughters learn how it’s done.

He thanked all the children, but added a special note for Heshy: “Not only my youngest, but my chavrusa.”

“Pssshhh, I didn’t know that,” Nussi said. “When do you learn?”

“We learn early in the morning,” Chaim said, “before the first minyan. It’s very geshmak then, the mind is clear.”

Heshy turned to beam at his wife. “It’s Gitty’s zechus, she lets me out then,” he said, and she looked genuinely pleased.

Shaindy couldn’t help but feel a stab of disappointment. It wasn’t her zechus? This wasn’t her house? And let’s be honest, Gitty didn’t exactly keep the baby quiet in the morning, and that meant that she lost sleep as well.

Okay, she didn’t mind sharing the zechusim, but couldn’t anyone have told her about this chavrusashaft? She made sure to smile, as if she had known about it.

“Isn’t it special?” she murmured to Brachi. “It’s so nice for Tatty. He loves it.”

It wasn’t until everyone was clearing out that she caught Leizer again. Moishe Dovid and Brachi had already said their goodbyes and they were waiting in the car while Leizer had stayed to help her put away the folding table.

“What were you saying before?” she asked him as they walked down to the storage room.

“Nothing, just the oilam says that Uncle Heshy is pravving rebbe here, that the oilam comes to him with all their middle-aged sh’eilos. Like he has kabbalas kahal, shtelling deios all day.”

She was genuinely confused. “Uncle Heshy? Is a rebbe?”

“Not a rebbe, but you know, there’s no rav here, so they come with their zachen to him. He does a Leil Shishi every week—”

“Not every week,” she protested, glad to be on firmer territory. She knew that it was officially once a month, because it happened in her kitchen and she did most of the cleaning up.

“Whatever, he sits with them and they love him. And another guy, the president or whatever, he’s more of a Queens kav, and he’s not soivel the whole thing, he wants a normal rav and he doesn’t like what Heshy is doing.”

“Is he getting another rav?” she asked, sounding panicked again.

Brachi was back. “Ma? Leiz? You have to come, tzaddik, you have Shacharis at 7:15 tomorrow, it’s late, let’s go,” she called down the stairs.

“I don’t know,” Leizer looked at Shaindy and shrugged. “It’s not kluhr, I think he’s looking shtark though. And that he thinks that once he has a rav, he’ll shut down the whole Heshy zach.”

“And what did you mean when you said he does kabbalah?” Shaindy asked urgently. Her daughter was still at the top of steps, peering down.

Leizer laughed. “No, not kabbalah, I meant like kabbalas kahal, you know, like he takes people in, like a rebbe. People come talk to him after the late Minchah, they hang around and wait their turn, I think. The oilam says he’s busy.”

So there was more she didn’t know. She wondered if Chaim was even aware of this, and which men came to talk to Heshy. What did they ask him, she wondered? Did he ever tell them things about her and Chaim?

She imagined him sitting back in a chair in the quiet room off of the shul, leaning back on a wooden chair, his listening face on. Yes, he would be saying, I know it’s a confusing time, my parents are going through the same thing, not really sure what’s next, what they’re meant to be doing…

Brachi had come all the way down the stairs now. “Leizer, come on, Tatty is waiting. Ma, it was an amazing party, I don’t know how you do it…”

to be continued…

(Originally featured in Mishpacha, Issue 912)