Turn your current identity upside down to find your ideal one

Kayla: Bigger kids, bigger expense

Russy: I want to stop wanting

Elisheva: Frugal mom of twin toddlers

Tamar: Bills scare me

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ast week, we discussed how you grew up around money. This week, we’re going to talk about your financial identity, which is how you see yourself around money. Your Financial Identity is based on your beliefs, skills, behaviors, and environment. When you know how your internal landscape around money operates, you will be able to engage with your finances in a healthy way and make improvements.

The triangle is made up of five elements that either create or support your identity. To find your current identity, start with environment and work your way up.

ENVIRONMENT What’s the snapshot of my financial situation right now? How much savings or debt do I have? How much is in our account? Do we have any assets? Something put away for retirement? How much do I work? How much help do I have around the house? What am I and my kids able (or unable) to do?

ACTIONS What behaviors (positive or negative) got me to this environment? If you have savings, the action might be setting an automated transfer every week or working with a financial planner. If you have debt, the action might be that you obsess about or ignore the numbers.

KNOWLEDGE What knowledge or skills led me to take the actions that created my environment? You might take courses and read books or watch videos online — or do none of those at all.

BELIEFS What beliefs about money led me to actively develop those skills? If you’ve never taken action, the belief might be, “It’s not a woman’s job.” Maybe you think being rich is bad. Maybe you subconsciously believe you’ll never have enough anyway, so why even try?

IDENTITY What do my environment, my beliefs, my skills, and my actions say about who I am? Give this identity a name like “Anxious Avigail” or “Broke Bracha.” Your identity can be anything, you don’t need to use your own name.

Now comes the fun part. Flip your triangle and start from the top. Name your ideal identity. Who do you want to be?

Then work backward to identify the beliefs, skills, actions, and environments this ideal version of you needs to create. What’s possible for you? What are you capable of? What’s your family’s financial situation like in this ideal situation?

Readers! Follow along for an in-depth look at Elisheva’s current and ideal financial identity, and then create your own identity triangle.