"And Miriam answered them ‘Sing to Hashem for very exalted is He’ ” (Shemos 15:21).

Chazal state that in Gan Eden there’s a special chamber where the song of Miriam continues to be sung. What was so unique about Miram’s song as opposed to Moshe’s?

To understand one must appreciate the avodah of women.

The pasuk in Devarim (31:19) refers to the Torah as a shirah. While men continue the chain of mesorah through limud women maintain Miriam’s tradition of Torah through song.

Shlomo Hamelech writes in Mishlei (1:8): “Do not forsake the Torah of your mother.” This refers to shirah. Women are exempt from structured limud Torah because they relate to Torah through the emunah that comes from within. The Midrash Tanchuma (parshas Vayigash) tells us that Avraham as well “learned Torah from himself.”

It says in Yirmiyahu (31:32) that Hashem will inscribe the Torah on our hearts. This too refers to the Torah of women who learn Torah from their hearts. (Harav Itamar Shwartz Bilvavi Mishkan Evneh)

“Listen it’s fine with me if we skip my birthday this year.”

“Ma! Are you kidding? We’re planning a major celebration — especially this year!”

I was approaching the big 40 over-the-hill middle-age-crisis birthday and I preferred to ignore the implications and celebrate a senior moment by forgetting my birthday entirely. But my kids weren’t going for it.

“You’re going to love what we have planned!”

I envisioned a harmonized choir with off-key renditions rhapsodizing about the big number 40. It was not my idea of fun.

Shirah comes from the word sharsheres — chain. When one sees how the events of life and of history are linked to complete a chain he sings.

Miriam’s name signifies this as it stems from merirus — bitterness. When she sang shirah Miram linked the chain of events from the bitterness of Egypt to the ultimate miracles of the redemption. (ibid.)

The weeks leading up to my birthday only deepened my hesitations. The kids snuck around the house giggling making phone calls and practicing (a skit? choir?) all in my honor. I glimpsed half-finished projects cakes and banners all with the big 4-0 prominently displayed. I was going to have to face this milestone with fanfare.

When a person realizes how her life experiences link to form a chain she’s able to sing shirah about her life.

It’s like a jigsaw puzzle. The more pieces you add the more you see the full picture and can put even more pieces in their place. (ibid.)

“Now for the main part of the program!” My daughter was MC and she loves dramatic flourishes. “We’ve been preparing for this for weeks! Months!” (40 years?) “So Ma just listen!”

I prepared myself for a giddy grammen poking fun at my advancing years.

The first voice jerked me to attention.

“Hi Faigy! Happy birthday!”

My best friend who had lived next door when I was a little girl! What was she saying?

“Remember clogging up the sink? And how about the time we ground erasers for weeks sure we were going to win the record for the biggest pile of eraser dust?”

Before I had a chance to react another familiar voice filled the room.

“Listen there’s a major DMC going on near the math room. See you there!”

My jaw dropped as I realized the theme of this presentation. My daughter had contacted many of the voices of my past — childhood and teenage friends a coworker my boss even an old neighbor I haven’t spoken to in years!

Listening to them reminiscing I was transported to the past; the memories were rich and heady.

Sefer Tehillim is the song of Dovid Hamelech’s life which encompasses the life of every Jew. It’s no wonder that women have a special connection to Sefer Tehillim.

The midrash states that Mashiach will reveal a “new Torah.” Obviously he will not replace the current Torah; yet he’ll reveal the entire story of our history. This will show us the chain of events which will prompt us to sing the ultimate shirah of redemption. (ibid.)

The chain of voices wound themselves around my heart holding it secure. I wondered why I’d been dreading this birthday. I was privileged to have a solid past full of friends and family who had helped built the foundation to support my present. And rather than seem frightening the future now seemed full of promise.