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Inbox: Issue 901

"Are the modern-day Zevuluns shortchanging their eternal profits as they scrimp in their support of today’s Yissachars?"

 

For Personal Gain [Take a Stand / Issue 900]

Thank you for raising the important topic of public condemnations. And thanks to the esteemed rabbanim who provided much insight and food for thought on this increasingly relevant topic.

Lately, we’ve all felt that pressure to “call out” or condemn bad behavior or bad actors, with the unspoken message being, “If you don’t call them out, you’re part of the problem. If you don’t condemn, you’re holding back necessary change.” However, all the rabbanim pointed out that any degree of effectiveness in condemning behavior — and thereby facilitating some kind of change — is largely dependent on the nature of the relationship between a person and his audience.

While none of the rabbanim mentioned this outright, it seems to me that the most common contemporary channel of “calling out” that exists today — i.e., via various social media platforms — does not really come with a strong relationship. It’s just a bunch of people, many hiding behind false identities, who loosely affiliate in some digital space. What kind of tangibly productive outcome can result from this kind of “calling out”?

The main result I’ve noticed isn’t lasting change. It’s the “condemner’s” personal glory and gratification in that space, and whatever benefits he or she can reap as a result, many of which have no connection to the issue at hand.

And at what price? The callout-cancel culture rampant on these platforms lacks both nuance and focus, and requires minimal accountability from the callers-out, even when the potential damage to others is significant. While it can create a lot of noise and call attention to a “cause,” one gets the sense that it’s more about the condemner’s desire for exposure than any sincere desire to bring about actionable change, which is a lot more complex and organic than any digital noise.

Yossi B., Lakewood NJ

 

Personal View [On the Giving End / Issue 899]

Rachel Ginsberg’s excellent article on Yaakov Shisha covers so many of his projects and personal activities that a reader might wonder if the author is exaggerating in some way. How can a man of such modest origins be doing so many significant things?

I must admit that several years ago I wondered the same thing. I had been contributing to Reb Shisha’s efforts in a very small way for a number of years and had listened to him tell of some of his projects, which, although they were fewer and smaller at that time, left me skeptical.

So upon arrival in Yerushalayim one Thursday evening, my wife and I decided to walk to Meah Shearim and see what was going on at the Tov V’chesed warehouse. We stood outside and peered in, trying to assess what was happening without being seen when, to our mortification, Reb Yanky spotted us and came out to give us a warm greeting despite our “just happening” to be there. He gave us a tour of the operation, the nearby apartment for orphans, and his meticulously organized offices.

Since that time my wife and I have had the opportunity to get a firsthand look at Reb Shisha’s work and to witness his and his wife’s truly remarkable Friday night hospitality. It’s difficult to capture in words the Friday night scene in his house, where over a hundred bochurim sit around his elaborately appointed table, singing zemiros while their host serves them himself.

So how is he able to do all this? I can only say that it must be a miracle and that I feel privileged, along with all your readers, to be able to see Hashem’s Hand work its magic. There remain numerous opportunities to help in all these projects. May he and all those who help him continue to have hatzlachah in this holy work.

Shmuel Steier, Monsey, NY

 

Scrimp, Save, and Donate Big Bucks [On the Giving End / Issue 899]

I was really amazed at the amount of chesed that Mr. Shisha does and how he was able to build up a successful business. However, his description of the market-value salary that doesn’t cover the average frum family’s living expenses reminded me of a question I often grapple with.

Our community includes many baalei chesed and baalei tzedakah who give generously to tzedakah but scrimp and save on their employees’ salaries. I’m sure I’m not the only person who wonders about this pattern, and what it says about the bosses and their priorities.

I live in Israel. I know many people living here who work for American bosses. These bosses are frum, erliche Yidden who take pride in hiring wives of avreichim. Yet you wouldn’t even be able to hire a worker off the street in America for the type of pay they offer these women. Here they are getting bright, smart, educated young women who have chosen to come and settle in Eretz Yisrael to help their husbands shteig, and who subsist on pitiful wages. These bosses are baalei tzedakah, yet can’t be bothered to give a normal salary that would allow their workers to make it through the month.

I know of a boss who has no problem giving a million dollars a year to tzedakah, but who had to be begged again and again to raise his worker’s hourly wages from the minimum of $13 to $14. And the only explanation he provided is that “business is business and tzedakah is tzedakah.”

In a similar vein, it often bothers me that kollelim or people who support those who sit and learn are so happy to arrange kimcha d’Pischa distributions, sales on chicken, clothing sales, coupons for milk and bread — but for some reason can’t be bothered to simply give that same kollel yungerman a normal amount of money per month.

It seems like our mental picture of a yungerman is a harried person running from sale to sale, schlepping bags, filling out forms, and waiting on lines — instead of a Yissachar who has his needs taken care of by Zevulun, so he can sit and learn in peace. I highly doubt that our current model is in keeping with the original vision of the partnership, and I wonder whether the modern-day Zevuluns are shortchanging their eternal profits as they scrimp in their support of today’s Yissachars.

B. W.

 

Ready to Opt Out? [On the Giving End / Issue 899]

Thank you for your fascinating feature on Yanky Shisha and his chesed empire.

While the article discussed the terrible debt weighing down so many people in Eretz Yisrael, it did not mention one of the primary causes of that debt: the pervasive practice in Eretz Yisrael to have shidduchim hinge on the purchase of an apartment for the young couple.

Considering that the cost of an apartment in any established chareidi enclave is easily in the millions of shekels, and that even a down payment runs upward of half a million shekels, parents are compelled to borrow huge sums of money each time they wish to marry off a child. Multiply that by eight, or twelve, or fifteen children, and the result is often a heart attack.

Unlike many native Israelis, we English-speaking immigrants are reluctant to take on these impossible debts, nor are we willing to collect money in Israel or abroad to marry off our children. We are also mystified (or repulsed) by the idea of running from gemach to gemach, taking out an endless string of loans to repay previous loans that are due.

Yet in order to do shidduchim within the Israeli system, we still need to commit to paying for at least part of an apartment. From what we are hearing from many immigrants, no one wants to take part in this system, but everyone capitulates out of fear that their children will have trouble getting shidduch suggestions if they don’t commit.

Can we stop this insanity, at least among ourselves? Considering that children of English-speakers in Eretz Yisrael are mostly marrying into English-speaking families, why can’t we form a network in which we can do shidduchim without committing to paying for an apartment?

To gauge interest in such an initiative, in which families would sign up to indicate their willingness to do shidduchim with like-minded families (for both their sons and daughters), I have set up an email address, simchosbyeveryone@gmail.com, to which readers can send a message indicating that they would consider being part of such a network.

Thank you, Mishpacha, for serving as a platform for meaningful societal changes like these.

A Concerned Parent of a Shidduch-Aged Child

 

Abiding Respect [For the Record / Issue 899]

Among my mother’s many memories of her hometown Slotfina in Czechoslovakia was the parade she marched in as a student in the public school, marking the birthday of President Tomas Masaryk. It was so important, she would tell us, that they wore their best clothing and could not miss marching. Mr. Masaryk was good to the Jews of Czechoslovakia and everyone liked him; my mother would speak about him with admiration.

So I was very interested in the For the Record description of his trip to the yishuv in Palestine in 1927 and the rabbanim who greeted him, confirming what my mother said about him. I showed the article with the accompanying picture to my mother. She appreciated it and she read it with interest.

Naomi Bachrach

 

Long-Distance Support [A Kingdom Rebuilt / Issue 898]

I read with interest your article about the previous Belzer Rav. It truly adhered to the high standards of Mishpacha articles — thoroughly researched, well written, and beautifully presented. I would, however, like to share some of my own recollections and details I heard from my family about the participation of American Jewry in the postwar rejuvenation of Belz.

We must remember the conditions under which Jews in Palestine lived: Arab riots, the British Mandate, a harsh climate, meager eagers that barely covered basic needs. These Jews were joined by the few lucky ones who had escaped Europe. Most had entered illegally and only with “the shirt on their back.” Neither group was in a position to finance the reestablishment of Belz — not even in a modest little house in Katamon.

The task fell to the small group of Belzer chassidim in the American community, led by an elderly Holocaust survivor, Reb Hershel Regenbogen, and a somewhat younger Hebrew books dealer, my father-in-law Reb Yaker Biegeleisen.

Together they searched for and found chassidim, hopefully with some means, who had been in Belz or had some connection to the chassidus. Their success is history, as their efforts were instrumental in building the Belzer shul and yeshivah on Rechov Agripas. From there the postwar Belzer kehillah rose from the ashes of the Holocaust and continues to grow and flourish under the leadership of the current Belzer Rav shlita.

In those early years, Reb Yaker Biegeleisen also set up a system of collecting monthly dues for the upkeep of the household of Rav Ahron, referred to as “Maamudos.” Everyone on his list received a monthly statement. If Reb Yaker did not receive a return envelope in the mail, he made “house calls” to collect the dues. He also revived the system of kvittlach to be sent overseas. Since telephone calls were prohibitively expensive, these were sent via cable and the gabbaim brought them to the Rav.

I do not wish to undermine the hard work of those who undertook the enormous task of rebuilding Belz in Eretz Yisrael, but do want to point out the concerted efforts and the contributions of their like-minded supporters in America.

Mrs. G. Biegeleisen, Brooklyn, NY

 

(Originally featured in Mishpacha, Issue 901)

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