“If I’m supposed to live a life like everyone else, why did You make me so different?”

ZeeZee pulled her scarf up over her mouth as she stepped out of the cab at Shaar Ha’ashpot. It was late and she knew she was risking curfew, but she didn’t care.

She had no desire to go back to the dorm. There was nobody there she felt like speaking to. No one she felt like calling, either. No friends. No family members. And the only teacher she felt like reaching out to was unreachable. She’d never felt so alone.

She kept walking until, finally, she was in front of the Kosel.

The only One left to talk to.

ZeeZee put her hand on the stone. And the words burst out: Hashem, what’s going to be with me?

She’d always thought it was everyone else’s problem that she was different. That it was exciting to march to a different drummer, and if adults in her life had an issue with that, well, let them. But she was no longer so confident that she could trust her instincts, no longer sure that the adults in her life were all wrong.

When will you settle down, ZeeZee? It was Gitty’s voice, but it was also her own.

She touched her forehead to the Wall. “Hashem,” she whispered. “If I’m supposed to live a life like everyone else, why did You make me so different?”

There was no answer, no major revelation exploding inside her brain. Not that she expected one. Maybe the question didn’t even make sense. After all, wasn’t everyone different from each other? What if her real problem was that she saw herself as unique, when really she was no more unique than anyone else?

That was the most terrifying thought of all.

ZeeZee stood there for a while, eyes squeezed shut, feeling the cool rock through her glove, until the calm of the ancient stones began to seep into her.

The moment was interrupted by the peal of her phone.

She looked down and groaned. Gitty. The last person she felt like speaking to right now. But her sister had come through for her with this campaign. With a sigh, she stepped away from the Kosel and answered the call.

“What’s up, Gitty?”

“ZeeZee! I’m glad you answered. Listen, we need to discuss what to do with the money.”