What do I want them to say at my levayah? That I tried

I don’t recall how the conversation started that Shabbos morning, but my husband said, “I hate those people who say, ‘No hespedim at my levayah.’ People want to talk, let them say nice things about you.”

Me, natural contrarian that I am, said, “I’d rather people say nothing than lie about me.”

“Lie?” my husband asked mildly.

“Yeah, they’ll say I’m a nice person. And stuff like that. Y’know how they try to inspire you by telling you to be the person you want people to talk about at your levayah? Well, they’re gonna say nice things about me no matter what I do. So that pep talk doesn’t work on me.”

My husband laughed. “Well, I want them to say nice things about me.”

“I’ll make sure they do,” I reassured him. Which of course led to the conversation of which of us will die first.

And then we took Shabbos naps and that was the end of that conversation. And I never had to answer the question — what do I want people to say about me if I don’t want them to just say I was “nice”?