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Folic Acid, Without the Fear 

Lately I’ve been hearing versions of the same question: Do I really need folic acid? Isn’t it synthetic? What about methylfolate?

Folic Acid, Without the Fear
Dr. Jennie Berkovich

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here are few nutrients that have been studied as much folic acid, and yet few that generate as much confusion. Lately I’ve been hearing versions of the same question: Do I really need folic acid? Isn’t it synthetic? What about methylfolate?

Folic acid is a form of vitamin B9, a nutrient the body relies on to make DNA, build red blood cells, and support rapid growth. Those jobs matter throughout life, but they’re especially critical in the earliest weeks of pregnancy, when the baby’s brain and spinal cord are forming, often before a woman realizes she’s expecting.

Folate is the naturally occurring form of vitamin B9 found in foods like leafy greens, beans, citrus fruits, and liver. When we eat these foods, our bodies can absorb and use folate directly.

Folic acid, on the other hand, is the synthetic, more stable form added to supplements and fortified foods such as flour, bread, cereal, and pasta. Once ingested, folic acid is converted by the body into the same active folate it uses from food.

Because diet alone often doesn’t provide enough folate to protect early pregnancy, many countries, including the United States, require folic acid fortification of grain products. This public health policy has dramatically reduced the rates of neural tube defects like spina bifida and anencephaly.

Medical guidelines consistently recommend that women who may be expecting take 400 to 800 micrograms of folic acid daily, ideally starting one to three months before conception and continuing through early pregnancy. Some women, such as those with a prior pregnancy affected by a neural tube defect, certain medical conditions, or specific medications, may need higher prescription doses, but that decision should always be made together with a clinician.

In recent years, many families have heard about alternative forms of folate, particularly L-methylfolate, often marketed as “more natural” or necessary for people with MTHFR gene variants. While methylfolate is one of the active forms circulating in the body, current evidence doesn’t show that it offers better protection against birth defects than standard folic acid for the general population. Most people, including those with common MTHFR variants, can process folic acid just fine. Professional medical organizations continue to recommend plain folic acid because it is stable, well studied, and effective.

It’s also worth clearing up a few common misconceptions. Folic acid at recommended doses is safe and lifesaving. However, more isn’t always better. Very high intakes can have downsides, but the standard doses used in prenatal care are carefully chosen and supported by decades of data.

For most families, the goal is simple. Eat a balanced diet rich in natural folate and pair it with an appropriate folic acid supplement. No guilt and no perfection required. Just small, steady choices that quietly support healthy pregnancies, often before we even realize how much is happening beneath the surface.

Dr. Jennie Berkovich is a board-certified pediatrician in Chicago and serves as the Director of Education for the Jewish Orthodox Women’s Medical Association (JOWMA)

People-Pleasing
Sara Eisemann

“People-pleasing is thinking about others primarily from your fear, from your hurt.” –MJ Barker

People-pleasing has gotten a really bad rap. It’s become the trademark of inauthenticity and the hallmark of an unhealthy person. But that may be a sweeping generalization that requires a little more introspection and clarification.

We’re wired to connect, and pleasing others is one way to do that. Putting the needs of another over our own needs actually has a place in avodas hamiddos. Intuitively, we sense that taking the time to notice another and to do what pleases them is a very powerful way to grow closeness and affection. So where does it go wrong?

The goal is to love and serve others from a place that’s value-based, aligned, and grounded. When we’re healthy and whole and know our own worth, and are independent of others, then we can choose to overflow and do for them in a loving way.

But when we please others because we’re afraid of losing their love or approval, then the relationship becomes skewed and the giving is off balance. At that point, it’s no longer about connection, it’s about protection. It’s about doing what it takes to preserve the self, not to grow the relationship.

The irony of this dynamic is that it leaves both parties depleted because it is, in fact, not authentic or organic. There’s a forced energy and a lack of flow that is draining rather than energizing. The unspoken fear laces every interaction with falseness and neither party is free to relax into the relationship.

Let’s replace the fear of people-pleasing with a more mindful awareness of the emotion that fuels it. If we determine it’s based in fear or hurt, let’s reassess whether this is a relationship that can be realigned from a safe and secure place.

Sara Eisemann, LMSW, ACSW, is a licensed therapist, Directed Dating coach and certified Core Mentor.

Reoccurring Conflicts
Abby Delouya

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ecurring conflicts are one of the most frustrating experiences couples face. You can change the topics and timing — and still find yourselves in the same argument. When this happens, the issue usually isn’t about what’s happening on the surface, but rather it’s motivated by the core cognition underneath it.

A core cognition is the deeply held belief that shapes how we interpret our partner’s behavior, thoughts like “I’m not important,” “I can’t rely on anyone,” or “If I don’t stay in control, I’ll get hurt.” These quietly drive emotional reactions long before words are exchanged. When these beliefs go unexamined, couples end up constantly defending themselves rather than understanding each other.

Identifying the challenging core belief helps couples move from blame to curiosity. Instead of arguing about what happened, they can explore why it felt so threatening. This shift creates space for empathy, accountability, and repair. When we understand what feels sensitive and emotionally big for our spouses, our own emotional defensive response gets tempered with compassion.

Abby Delouya LMFT, CPTT is a licensed marriage and family therapist in private practice with a specialty in trauma and addiction. She has a private practice and is the director of Intake and Care Management for Ray of Hope.

 

(Originally featured in Family First, Issue 978)

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