“Who said their convenience should take precedence over the girls’ convenience?”

Last Week:

“Question: I know you requested the private dining room for the weekend, but there is one other family celebrating Shabbat here, and they asked if they can join you. Otherwise, they’ll just be eating their meals in their room.”

I bite my lip. Bayla.

“I’d really rather not,” I tell Paulina. Honestly, why can’t they just go to the Chabad next door?

Professional that she is, Paulina just nods smoothly and backs away.

I bite my lip. Did I just make a chillul Hashem... for both Paulina and Bayla? I want to be a nice person — I am a nice person, generally — and I really do understand that it’s hard to be cooped up with four kids in one room, but she decided to come here knowing what it’d be like, and she made the choice to come here anyway. Should I really allow her to destroy the annual oasis we’ve created?

Bayla’s lack of sensitivity really put me in a corner, and I’m not really sure there was anything else I could have done.

Awkward Much?

Gitty Perl, Montreal

Chelli did absolutely nothing wrong. First of all, if her friend Bayla wanted to join her in the dining room for the Shabbos meals, she should have asked her directly. By going through the concierge, Bayla showed that she knew her request was inappropriate. Secondly, this is a group trip; it would have been wrong of Chelli to agree to let her join the meals without considering the rest of the group. I can assure you, none of them would have said yes. Thirdly… awkward much? Would Bayla’s Torah-learning, long-winter-zeman husband really have been okay sitting in a room full of women? Was he going to sit behind a mechitzah? I hate the expression “socially off” but if it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck….

Don’t give it a second thought. I hope Chelli and her friends enjoyed the rest of their European vacation and im yirtzeh Hashem next year they should be spending their honeymoon in Paris.