Crying It Out
| December 19, 2023Suddenly, I found myself questioning our all-knowing Father. How could He let such incredible atrocities happen?
I
’ve never been one to question why things happen. I feel the pain, I cry, and I daven and beg Hashem to help — but I simply haven’t struggled with the “how could Hashem…” aspect of history.
I felt a certain confidence in my emunah, a certain reassurance that when it comes down to it, I must have some strong faith if I subconsciously accept that I can’t possibly understand why Hashem does what He does. And the truth is, I wouldn’t want to, because a G-d I could understand wouldn’t be a G-d to Whom I could submit.
But all of this self-assured confidence in my own faith went out the window on Simchas Torah this year, the day forever to be remembered as the October 7 massacre. As news trickled in and then turned to a deluge, the horrific details threatened to drown me as they pulled and tore at my heart and soul. Suddenly, I found myself questioning our all-knowing Father. How could He let such incredible atrocities happen? How could a human being or a nation be expected to survive this kind of torture?
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