“Shh! Not so loud. Oy, Nomes, you poor thing, you walked right into the chaos”

MA’Snot talking about the Great Cellphone Crime of 2023. Not to me, not to my siblings, not even to Tatty. I know, because I mentioned something and he looked genuinely shocked. “You were the cell phone bandit?” were his exact words.

Which was an issue, because I have never been able to lie to Tatty. Not, chas v’shalom, that I walk around lying. But even the occasional exaggeration has me blushing.

But here I had Debbi in mind and was able to keep a straighter face than usual.

Debbi’s not talking about it either. She thinks I’m insane, but she’s also overflowing with gratitude, and it’s getting to be a bit annoying.

The class is trying to speculate why Ma has stopped lecturing about derech eretz and accountability before each lesson. Faigy even called out at recess, “Naomi, if you told your mom it was getting to be a lot, then thanks so much.”

Which is like ridiculously rude, but whatever.

The only real ramification is that the family cell phone has mysteriously disappeared from my room. Which is a bummer. Especially since I’m not the idiot who left her phone on in class.