Parshas B’haalosecha

“Did I conceive this entire people? Did I give birth to them that You say to me ‘Carry them close to you as a nursing mother carries an infant…’” (Bamidbar 11:12)

The Sifri questions Moshe’s words above: When did Hashem command Moshe that he must carry Bnei Yisrael close to him?

At the time that Hashem sent Moshe and Aharon to take Bnei Yisrael out of Mitzrayim He told them “You know that they’re insubordinate and troublesome. They’ll curse you and throw stones. But you will respond with good and take them out of Mitzrayim.” (Rav Shach Meirosh Amanah)

“She almost made me cry.”

My husband paused while unpacking the groceries. “Who?”

“Sharona the nurse at Tipat Chalav [the well baby clinic]. She said I was five minutes late and my baby is suffering and—”

“The baby’s suffering because you were late to your appointment?”

“No! He’s not developing properly because of my inadequacies! He doesn’t hold his head up properly and it’s probably my fault because I can barely hold my up own head and—” I was working my way up to a full-blown exhausted-mother-of-a-newborn tantrum.

“Well is he developing properly?” My husband is male and fails to see the emotion latent in such a question.

“He’s perfect!”

Why were Moshe and Aharon commanded to do good to Bnei Yisrael if the nation was acting badly toward them?

This teaches us an important concept about connections between people. When Moshe and Aharon acted with kindness to Bnei Yisrael it stopped their acting badly toward them.

Wherever conflict is found there’s an obligation to reciprocate with kindness. In this way the influence of bad middos is mitigated. (ibid.)

I’ve been spoiled. When I lived in Yerushalayim Barbara the nurse at the local Tipat Chalav always kvelled over my babies like they were the most special infants she’d seen all morning. (Which of course they were.)

When I moved I was unprepared for the other extreme.

“He’s short.” Sharona frowned at the graph charting my baby’s growth.

“Well I’m short.” I tried to smile. “And he seems to be progressing nicely.”

“Don’t you see how his head is wobbling on his neck?”

Not really. To me his head neck and cute little chin all looked perfect. But I nodded dutifully waited until I was in the privacy of my own home and then let loose on my husband.

“I’m never going back there again!”

From here we can learn a kal v’chomer for ourselves. Moshe Rabbeinu was considered a king and everyone was obligated to honor him. Yet even he was commanded by Hashem to do good to those who were fighting against him.

How much more so must we act kind when people try to cause us pain. When we relate to them with kindness that will stop their cruelty toward us. (ibid.)

Despite my determination it was soon time for another well baby visit. Not wanted a repeat of last visit’s inquisition I came better prepared.

“Good morning Sharona. I made these for you.” I slid a plate of hot muffins onto her desk. “Last visit we discussed nutrition so I wanted to share this new recipe I made. It has flax seed wheat germ and bran in it.” (And my five-year-old gagged when he ate it.)

Sharona looked surprised but took a small bite. “Nice. Flax seed is very healthy.”

“I also wanted to ask your opinion.” I was warming up to my role in this drama and decided to lay it on thick. “Since last visit I’ve been doing exercises with my baby to strengthen his neck muscles. What do you think? I’m scared his head is still wobbly.”

“Wobbly?” she lifted Junior and to my shock cooed into his face. “His neck is perfect. See how regally he holds his head.”

Dale Carnegie couldn’t have gotten better results.

“But I’m still worried. Do you think he’s too short?”

She weighed and measured the baby handling him gently.

“No of course not. Look how nicely he’s gained. He’s developing beautifully.”

“Oh thank you!” I gushed. “I’m so grateful for all the pointers you’ve been giving me. These early months of development are so important and I want him to get all the nutrients and exercise he needs.”

“You just keep taking care of this little prince like you’ve been doing until now and I’m sure we’ll see a lot of nachas when you come next time.”

I sailed out of her office the scent of bran muffins floating behind me. (Originally Featured in Family First Issue 545)