Had she been kidding herself all those years? Had she really never had potential to be anything more than an amateur?

“Well, first of all, how many of us have ever actually encountered a molehill?” —Stephen Dubner, No Stupid Questions, Ep94

Eva ran her finger over the cellos; the wood was cold and smooth. She inhaled deeply, taking in the scent of wood, oak, spruce, and polish. They should make a diffuser that smelled like this. This she’d buy, not the overly perfumed ones everyone seemed to have plugged into their walls these days.

She wasn’t sure why she was in the cello and violin store; she’d somehow felt compelled to come — for what, to what, she didn’t know. She just felt an undercurrent of restless energy and wanted to release it somehow, and now she was here.

She wasn’t sure what her next steps should be. Alana and Shaindel Rochel had opened her eyes — maybe too much. They made sense, though; she had a lot of questions to answer.

A cello caught her eye. The store had an area where customers could try out instruments, with a small selection of bows and a chair. On a whim Eva lifted the cello out of its anchor. The instrument was heavier than she remembered it being. She sat down, centered herself and her posture.

The movements came back to her like muscle memory: feet flat and firm, neck and spine long and relaxed. It was like she was 14 all over again. She pulled the instrument toward her and lifted the bow. Time to make magic, her mind whispered, and she drew the bow over the strings. A discordant screech emitted.

Eva adjusted her grip; it had been nearly 35 years since she’d last played. The movement was better and tone steady, but the tone was still off. She tried playing basic scales. Everything sounded awful.

Had she been kidding herself all those years? Had she really never had potential to be anything more than an amateur?

“How’s it going?” a voice asked. Eva jumped.

It was the proprietor. Did he recognize her from her last visit?

“Badly,” she answered honestly. She laid the bow to the side and pulled the cello upright.

“Your organization or your playing?”

So, he did recognize her. She laughed mirthlessly.

“Both.”