It’s no longer about mental illness — today people want to access their best selves

More people than ever are accessing therapy. Why? Are we more stressed than our and grandparents were? Have we failed to develop the bitachon that’s needed for a sense of well-being? Or are we just self-indulgent people looking for attention?

The answer to those questions is no, no, and no! We have the same faith and fears people have always had. What we also have is modern psychology. Modern psychology isn’t the same as the psychology of yesteryear — yesteryear being as recent as 2010. The very word “psychology” was, a few decades ago, suspect. Alien philosophies colored its nature and techniques. Practitioners embedded in secular ideologies led our people away from cherished values, beliefs and practices. Psychology posed a spiritual threat even as it purported to heal mental and emotional functioning.

People accessed psychologists and psychiatrists only for the purposes of treating mental illness. Mental illnesses, which still plague many people today, are brain diseases that interrupt normal, healthy functioning. The only people who sought professional help were those who were seriously incapacitated by mental disorders. This gave psychology a stigma, negatively impacting shidduchim and shaming those who “needed” it. Those who sought treatment found themselves painted with the same brush as psychotic patients languishing in locked-door facilities.

Modern Psychology

All this has dramatically changed. Even those suffering from mental illnesses receive outpatient medical treatment that frequently provides stabilization. But more commonly, it’s not serious illness that prompts people to access psychological services. Clients (not “patients”) are seeking an improved quality of life, and a higher level of emotional, intellectual, interpersonal, and physical well-being.

Just because a person functions adequately doesn’t mean she’s living her best life. Until recently, it was common for “successful” businessmen to die of heart attacks. Although heart disease is still a common health issue, more men are now able to access the psychological services that prevent deadly levels of stress.

Similarly, until recently, many people “managed” their stress through alcohol and drug use and other equally harmful behaviors. Yes, it still happens, but today many have access to psychological services that address the underlying traumas, anxieties, and mood disorders that cause people to “self-medicate.” Suffering silently with insomnia, panic attacks, low mood, high levels of anger — all of this is diminishing as more people get to the root of their problems.

As increasing numbers of people access professional services, we’ll see less physical illness, behavioral/addictive disorders, and emotional suffering. We’ll see higher levels of physical and mental health. Our challenge now is to see to it that everyone has the opportunity to benefit from the help that modern psychology provides.

Psychology in Action

Chava didn’t get what she needed from her parents. Even the basics were missing: clean clothes and three meals a day. The house was never presentable enough for her to bring friends over, and her father couldn’t be relied upon to control his temper. Both parents functioned in a manner we’d now probably identify as untreated ADHD with comorbid depression, OCD, and social anxiety; neither could help themselves, let alone provide a healthy environment for their six children.

Chava struggled with her own mental health, but born in a different time, she was able to access professional counseling. She cleared the pain of her dysfunctional childhood, learned the skills she needed for maintaining a positive outlook and a stable mood, and acquired the tools for marriage, parenting, and home management that her mother couldn’t give her.

Efraim grew up in a happy home with healthy parents. However, he struggled with a tendency to worry. This induced guilt (because he knew he didn’t have the right Torah mindset), physical agitation (from the chronic drip of cortisol into his system), and reduced joy in living. His condition was inborn but neurologically enhanced due to the way he employed his brain. This was something he learned about and then rectified as a result of seeking the help of a psychologist. This gave him improved health, energy, and mood. He used all of this to enhance his service of Hashem.

We’re blessed to have access to the healing effects of modern psychology. It’s a true gift from Hashem.

(Originally featured in Family First, Issue 778)