“Eureka!” I thought. “That’s it! Texting: a blessing or a nightmare? A gift or the curse of modern technology?” I thought of the upcoming holiday period and the Shanah Tovah wishes that would soon appear. The more creative or high-tech of my acquaintances (even relatives) might add smiling emojis. There would be next-level stickers with bouncing honey dishes, complete with Shanah Tovah u’Mesukah raining down… or, of course, traditional apples dipping in honey at three-second intervals. Oh, yes, I could hardly wait.

What happened to the human voice? Is everyone so busy saving the world that, with the same phone in hand, they can’t expand on those wishes for a good year with a few moments of conversation? I remember a shiur that the venerated Rabbi Yissocher Frand once gave in Brooklyn during the Aseres Yemei Teshuvah. Even years ago, when texting wasn’t as rampant, he discussed this issue. He described a study done on high school girls presented with a stressful situation. One set of girls was allowed to call their mothers; the other was told to text their parents. Then, their stress hormone levels were measured. The girls who spoke to their mothers had a significant reduction in stress levels, while the group who texted did not!

Years ago, for some time, a friend hosted a young woman who had immigrated to America. Since then, every Erev Rosh Hashanah and Erev Pesach, my friend  receives a phone call from this woman to catch up and wish her a good Yom Tov.

This year, my friend received the following text: I know how busy you are, so I just wanted to wish you and the family Shanah Tovah and wishes for the coming year. My friend replied, I’m not too busy to speak to you and would like to catch up with you. Wishing you a Shanah Tovah. She was even more shocked when she received the following reply: Yes, best wishes to your family! Sigh… message totally missed.

Erev Shabbos calls, birthday wishes, anniversary congratulations, and even acknowledgments of yahrtzeits have become virtual. I have received texts stating, Thinking of you on what I know must be a difficult day! Really? Thanks for the exclamation point — that really is an additional nechamah.

Exclamation points, emoji with teardrops, or big smiles and birthday hats are no substitute for hearing a joyful “Mazel tov!” or the nuance of a soft voice saying, “I understand.” Sure, there’s a place for the quick, I’m at the corner! Where is the office? But when did electronic convenience substitute personal interaction? Are we really so busy, so self-engrossed, that taking the time to dial a family member or a friend is too much? That they can feel like they were important enough that we reached out? “Shema Yisrael” is the concept that sums up our relationship with our Creator. So glad Hashem didn’t text! I wouldn’t have wanted to miss His message!

All my wishes for a year of brachah and shalom to my wonderful readers. And yes, feel free to call! I’d love to hear your voice.

Kesivah v’chasimah tovah,

Ahava

(Originally featured in Family First, Issue 914)