“What will we gain if we kill our brother and cover his blood?”

(Bereishis 37:26)

The Tosefta (Brachos ch. 4) asks “Why was Yehudah deserving of royalty? Because he saved his brother from death.”

This is difficult to understand. If the brothers including Yehudah judged Yosef to be deserving of the death penalty then why is Yehudah now retracting his verdict? The answer lies in Yehudah’s question “What will we gain if we kill our brother and cover his blood?” Rashi explains “If we hide his death.” Even though the verdict was correct by hiding his death we are insinuating that we cannot take responsibility for it and that fact alone invalidates the verdict altogether.

As a result of this display of responsibility that Yehudah demonstrated he was deemed worthy of becoming royalty. (Rabbi Chaim Shmuelevitz essay 15 5731)

Some people are simply never the ones at fault. They’re not the ones who drove so fast and cut someone off without signaling. It wasn’t them; it was the traffic light at the corner.

They’re not the ones who knocked over that tower of canned pears in the entrance to the supermarket; it was the wagon whose wheels have a mind of their own. It’s not their fault that they are constantly buying sweets and gaining weight. It was their mother that started it; she never allowed sweets in the house. Why does anyone expect anything of them? It’s simply not their fault.

By nature a human being constantly tries to shrug off responsibility for his actions. He will constantly say “I haven’t done anything wrong.” As the navi Yirmiyahu says “… I will judge you for saying ‘I did not sin’$$SEPARATEQUOTES$$” (Yirmiyahu 2:35).

Rashi explains there a person can even deceive himself to believe that he did not sin. Indeed that is the main accusation against him; the emphasis is not on the sin itself but on his divesting himself of the responsibility for it. (ibid.)

If I allow myself to wallow in self-pity to blame everyone else for my mistakes and failures then I remain trapped. However if I can rise to the occasion and admit mistakes I can achieve the greatest of positions — royalty.

Furthermore Chazal tell us that Yehudah also earned the position of royalty because of the incident with Tamar. There too he exhibited responsibility as he said: “She is more innocent than I am!”  (Bereishis 38:26). He accepted full responsibility for his actions. Such is the trait of royalty; the actions of a king are always public not private.

Rabi Akiva expounds on this and says: Why did Yehudah earn royalty? Because he sanctified the Name of Hashem. When the tribes came to a halt by the Red Sea no one wanted to go in. The tribe of Yehudah jumped into the sea first and sanctified the Name of Hashem.

Thus the pasuk says “When Yisrael left Mitzrayim … Yehudah became His sanctuary Yisrael His subjects” (Tehillim 114:1–2). Yehudah sanctified the Name of Hashem and therefore he had sovereignty over Bnei Yisrael. At that time Yehudah accepted responsibility for the entire Jewish People and dove into the sea to save his brethren. As a result of that action the tribe of Yehudah became elevated above the rest of the Jewish People and transmitted to them all the strength to cross the sea as if it was actually dry land. The Jewish People now had the first seed of their own monarchy.

Being a king means agreeing to be “me.”

“I” am the one who made a mistake. “I” am the one who failed.

It wasn’t my parents or the traits that I inherited from my grandfather. It wasn’t my background that was too spoiled or too deprived. It wasn’t the other drivers or my daughter’s teacher.

I take responsibility for my actions. I admit to my own mistakes and I decide what mood I will be in today despite anyone who makes me angry.

I decide how my life will appear. I will decide that I am capable that I can succeed even if I failed yesterday. I will begin again tomorrow.

Being a king means ignoring the inner voice that would have me shirk responsibility. It means removing all the curtains behind which I have always hidden standing up and looking straight at myself and saying “It’s my life. Only I am responsible for it and only I will make all the decisions about it.”

Being a king means ruling over the greatest kingdom on earth.

The kingdom of your self.

Some people are simply never the ones at fault. They’re not the ones who knocked over that tower of canned pears in the supermarket; it was the wagon’s fault