Shavuos is the Yom Tov of chesed, kindness: That stands as the paramount message of Kabbalas HaTorah on many levels

Every Yom Tov gives us obligations and opportunities to fulfill special mitzvos. We hear the shofar, take the arba minim and sit in the succah, and meticulously carry out each of the mitzvos of the Seder.

But then comes Shavuos, and there seems to be no special mitzvah to fulfill. Certainly, we delight in learning Torah in the beis medrash all night, we enjoy reading Megillas Rus on Shavuos morning, and we uphold the minhag to eat dairy foods throughout Yom Tov. But there is no unique biblical or rabbinic mitzvah designated for Shavuos proper.

Or is there? The Rambam writes in hilchos Yom Tov (6:18):

When a person eats and drinks [on a Yom Tov], he is obligated to feed converts, orphans, widows, and others who are destitute and poor. In contrast, a person who locks the gates of his courtyard and eats and drinks with his children and his wife without feeding the poor and the embittered is not indulging in the rejoicing associated with a mitzvah, but rather in the rejoicing of his gut.

Regarding such people, the pasuk (Hoshea 9:4) states that their sacrifices will be like the bread of mourners, and all that partake of it shall become impure, for they kept their bread for themselves alone. This happiness is a disgrace for them, as the pasuk teaches (Malachi 2:3): “I will spread dung on your faces, the dung of your festival celebrations.”

Here the Rambam teaches that an essential obligation of every Yom Tov is to bring joy to those who are less fortunate. How can we enjoy the physical bounty of Yom Tov and not look out for those who are less privileged? How can we eat and drink and not ensure that others have those similar delicacies? How can we ignore the plight of those who once had more joy or those who currently struggle to experience joy?

On most Yamim Tovim, we have a good answer to these questions. We’re so busy fulfilling our own obligations first that we have barely any time to consider the plight of others. During Tishrei, we try to catch our breath while preparing for the Yamim Noraim, focusing on our personal mitzvah of teshuvah, and then somehow finding time to build our succah and procure arba minim, all while trying to keep up with our responsibilities and ensuring our family members are properly prepared for Yom Tov. As we usher in the month of Nissan, we are hyper-focused on cleaning for Pesach, shopping, cooking, and preparing ourselves and our family for the busy Yom Tov ahead.

These are largely fair points and plausibly answer the challenge of reaching out during the busy seasons. (I do think we need to see if we can do more, but suffice it to say that these are valid responses.)

Enter Shavuos, and none of these answers apply. There is no succah or Seder, no matzah or minim, and we are not as busy shopping, cooking, cleaning, preparing, and so on. So as we prepare for Shavuos, we must seriously contemplate how to fulfill the ultimate mitzvah of the Yom Tov — bringing joy to others. Now is the time, and this is our opportunity.

Moreover, Shavuos is the Yom Tov of chesed, kindness: That stands as the paramount message of Kabbalas HaTorah on many levels. We are taught that a prerequisite to our receiving the Torah was our unity, our camaraderie and brotherhood — “like one person with one heart” (Rashi, Shemos 19:2). Chazal teach that “regarding the Torah, its beginning is an act of kindness, and its end is an act of kindness” (Maseches Sotah 14). The Midrash (Rus Rabbah 2:14) explains, “This megillah [Rus] does not contain [the laws of] purity or impurity, and does not teach prohibitions or allowances. Why was it written? To teach you the extent of the good reward for those who perform kindness.”

Shavuos is the Yom Tov of chesed both on an academic level and on a practical level. The mitzvah of Shavuos is chesed, and it is incumbent upon us to engage in the mitzvah that sets us apart as the Torah nation. As the Gemara (Yevamos 79a) teaches, “There are three distinguishing marks of the Jewish People: They are merciful, they are bashful, and they perform acts of kindness.”

Our communities today have multitudes of widows, divorcees, orphans, singles, converts, and baalei teshuvah who are in dire need of affection, closeness, family, friends, and attention. Thankfully, there are many wonderful organizations that provide for their physical, emotional, and spiritual needs.

But as a community rabbi, I hear it again and again from members of this population, and from many rabbinic colleagues, that what most “singles” are really looking for is a family connection — a house they can feel a part of, a family they feel connected to, a couch where they can unwind, a dwelling to be themselves, a table where their voice is heard, an environment where they are valued for who they are, and a home that cares.

A recent divorcée told me that the most helpful thing for her would be if there were one family who would sincerely call and check in on her weekly. A widow told me that what enabled her to get through the most challenging months following the loss of her husband was knowing that there were several families who regularly and proactively invited her for Shabbos meals. Multiple converts have shared with me that while they receive much attention during their conversion process, when they finish, they feel lost in the big crowd, and hope that they are really accepted.

A single person shared with me the indescribable pain of walking to shul alone and walking home alone. “You will never know how hard that is,” he commented. Dozens of divorcées, widows, and singles have explained to me that Shabbos and Yom Tov can be extraordinarily lonely and painful to get through, especially the long winter Friday nights and the long summer Shabbos afternoons. There are hundreds and thousands of our brothers and sisters who are calling out to us and inviting us to help.

This Shavuos, let us rethink our obligation as a Torah nation; let us reach out, make our home their home, invite a guest who is really in need and will appreciate our warm and loving household. This is the mitzvah of Shavuos and the mitzvah of Yom Tov. Let’s bring joy to those who are looking to us and relying on us. They will forever be grateful, and you will gain even more than you can imagine, in this world and the next. —

Rabbi Moshe Walter is the rav of Woodside Synagogue Ahavas Torah in Silver Spring, Maryland, and the executive director of the Vaad HaRabanim of Greater Washington.

(Originally featured in Mishpacha, Issue 1063)