“A generation which reverses itself and cannot be trusted.” (Devarim 32:20)

There was once a small town storekeeper who went to the city to buy merchandise. He went to his usual wholesaler and asked to receive everything on credit since he had no money. He promised to pay his entire debt as soon as he came home.

But the wholesaler refused. “My records show you’ve already bought merchandise from me many times on credit and you promised each time to pay me back as soon as you got back home but you never fulfilled your promise. I can’t trust you anymore.”

The storekeeper began crying and pleading claiming he wasn’t at fault for his failure to keep his word and pay his previous debts on time various factors had been responsible for it and he couldn’t change them.… He begged the vendor to have pity on him and his family.…

The wholesaler was unable to remain indifferent to the storekeeper’s pleas and he gave in. (Mishlei HaChofetz Chaim parable 103) 

A certain woman once again showed up to buy on credit from the Master of the Universe. Before her were piles upon piles of packages containing the “merchandise” she wanted to buy precious beyond comprehension.

And she asked for even more — healthy children who succeed in learning and yiras Shamayim. Life and joy and emotional health. Wisdom and understanding and shidduchim and parnassah. The more the parcels piled up the more she seemed possessed by her drive for more.

When she became sadly aware that the price was enormous and that she was already unfathomably deep in debt to the Master of the Universe — after countless unfulfilled promises — she burst into tears and began pleading passionately.

And when the Master of the Universe heard her pleas and heartfelt prayers her longing for a good new year and the fear and awe that she felt on Rosh HaShanah He decided to grant her the wishes of her heart for He is compassionate merciful and slow to anger.

But when other merchants heard about it they told him the man’s word was worthless his promises were meaningless … (ibid.). 

Judgment Day has come. And this woman’s forgotten misdeeds and mistakes her unfulfilled promises and resolutions are a judgment against this woman. She does not keep her promises and does not pay for the things she requests before the King Who forgets nothing.

The woman is so confused so frightened. Now right now it is being decided who will live and who will die who by fire and who by water who will live in turmoil and who in tranquility. She wants to have a good year! With all her might she pleads for a year of sweetness a year filled with joy. No she cannot forego anything on that long list!

While they were debating the matter another merchant entered the store. After hearing the story he said to the small town storekeeper “Listen I’ll tell you something that will end this debate. Why do you need to buy so much merchandise wholesale and commit to paying so much money to the vendor when you won’t be able to pay him back in cash? He usually doesn’t sell in small quantities but I’m certain he’ll understand your plight and agree to sell you a small amount of merchandise at wholesale prices. That way you’ll be able to make a nice profit with these goods.” (ibid.)

There is the solution. The baalei mussar who understand our psyches give us the answer. Yes you are deeply indebted to Hashem and have committed many sins. But Hashem also understands how difficult it is for you and you can pay off the debts of your soul bit by bit step by step.

Want to improve shmiras halashon? Begin by not speaking about one person. To improve your davening? Begin with one brachah. Tzniyus? With one item of clothing.

We want to make big promises to our Father in Heaven but we must act wisely and pay our debts little by little. That will prove there’s value to our commitments that they won’t fade away after the Yamim Noraim. And then hopefully our Father will gift us with a year filled with blessing.