It's 25 or 50 years since they stood together under the chuppah. Families share golden memories of anniversary celebrations

Ionce heard a person say, at his golden wedding anniversary party, that the first 50 years of marriage are the hardest. Witticisms aside, a happy marriage is an achievement, whether it’s after one year, twenty-five, or fifty. Reaching these milestones is a cause for celebration. How can you mark the occasion in a way that’s memorable and meaningful? We looked at the way Jewish families from across the globe acknowledged their parents and grandparents’ special day.

The Silver Age

“We put much effort and thought into celebrating my parent’s 25th wedding anniversary,” relates Michal Rosner, CEO of Yotzrim Sevivah, an Israel-based nonprofit encouraging the development of art in the chareidi world. “We called people who knew them from way back and recorded them giving my parents a message.

“The idea was that our parents would have to identify the people from different times in their lives based on their voices alone. One person refused to cooperate, but my brother was able to get him for long enough to record him saying ‘no.’ His ‘no!’ was so sharp, my parents identified him immediately.

“My parents really enjoyed the party, mostly the fact we’d thought about them and put so much into planning it.”

Michal also described an anniversary party on her husband’s side of the family. “The first Shabbos I spent with my in-laws, my mother-in-law, a”h, told me excitedly about what their children had done for their silver wedding anniversary. They bought them a beautiful set of dishes and set a gorgeous Shabbos table. My in-laws were deeply touched.

“She also pointed to a stunning silver candelabra and told me this was her silver wedding anniversary present. Only a while later did I realize that behind ‘her present’ was a story that encapsulated her personality: My mother-in-law loved silver, and knew her children would probably not have enough money to buy her a candelabra. So she saved up a nice sum, and instead of twisting herself into a pretzel hinting to her husband that she’d really like a candelabra, she simply went to a silver store and ordered herself one. She returned home, showed it to her husband, and together they enjoyed the new purchase.”

Different families have very different ways of celebrating. “In my family, every event is ‘wow,’ and we’re always looking for an excuse to make a party,” says Racheli Gottlieb, a stage designer and producer from Bnei Brak.

“As a girl, I decided I’d produce something special for my parents’ silver anniversary. Then, digital cameras were the latest rage. I decided to approach many of my parents’ friends, neighbors, and acquaintances, and to ask them to give a brachah for the occasion. I filmed many interesting, unexpected people, such as the neighbor’s child who always stood in the parking lot and blocked my father from leaving, or my father’s friend who was living in Germany at the time.

“I brought the collection of videos to my friend’s sister and asked her to create an audiovisual presentation. I paid her with money I’d earned from a Tishah B’Av day camp I’d run.

“In my husband’s family, milestones are acknowledged with dignified quiet. I, the oldest daughter-in-law, who was used to action, was stunned at the modest way they marked significant occasions. I decided that we would celebrate their silver anniversary in style. Every time we mentioned the upcoming silver anniversary, my in-laws asked us ‘not to go crazy.’