"I know I have to bring her to meet my parents, but I also know what’s going to happen. My mother’s going to find all kinds of things wrong with her!”

Shani Leiman with Zivia Reischer

When Ari called me, I was impressed. It’s hard for people to ask for help, probably more so for guys.

But Ari was desperate.

“I need a dating coach,” he said.

Ari was 24, not “that old,” and he seemed to have everything going for him: great guy, great family, wanted to learn for a while, looking for a good Bais Yaakov girl. True, he’d been dating for three years already, but that wasn’t so unusual.

“How can I help?” I asked.

“I’m going out with this girl,” he started. “Her name is Tehila. She’s great.”

“Amazing!” I said.

“We went out eight times,” he said. “I really like her. She’s smart, she has a great sense of humor, she’s really nice, we just get each other, you know?”

“Sounds really good,” I said.

He laughed, suddenly sounding shy. “Yeah. I’m… I think we’re ready to get engaged.”

“But…”

“But… my mother.”

I waited.

He sighed. “See, about two and a half years before Tehila, there was Miri. I thought Miri might be the one. I brought her to meet my mother after the seventh date. But then she said no.”

I was confused. “Miri said no after meeting your mother?”

“No — my mother said no after meeting Miri."