They stood watching as the Yam Suf split. They journeyed after a pillar of fire surrounded by Clouds of Glory. They ate mahn each day and drank from a miraculous well. Their spiritual power is impossible to fathom.

Ramban explains that this pasuk is not referring to any mitzvos. The mitzvos were given later at Sinai. Rather Hashem taught them how to behave — to love their fellow men to seek counsel from their elders to be modest in their homes and to welcome peddlers who entered their camp. From the Ramban’s explanation we learn the priority the Torah gives to good middos and derech eretz (Rosh Amanah Rav Elazar Menachem Shach ztz”l).

Radin was Poland's Noach’s ark — no foreign wind was capable of penetrating. But there was one boy who needed a place to stay and though he’d been poisoned by the spirit of Enlightenment he decided to go to Radin. He would hide among the bochurim and the shtenders he thought regaining his strength before moving on.

He arrived in the small town on a bitter winter night and he made his way to the warmest building in town — the beis medrash. But the Chofetz Chaim's razor-sharp gaze bore into the young man’s soul. “No” he said “it’s forbidden to enter the Mishkan while one is tamei. Your place is not with us.”

The boy lowered his gaze. “Just for tonight” he begged. “The train has already left and it is so cold.”

The Chofetz Chaim would not endanger his students for a single night. “You will stay in my home” he decided “and tomorrow you can be on your way.”

The young man’s discomfort was palpable. But what could he do? That night as the tiny town was blanketed in deep snow the Chofetz Chaim sat before an open Gemara and warmed himself by its light. But he rose took and quietly draped his fur-lined coat over his guest so he would sleep well on that frigid night.

We also learn from this that even as we are move forward following the Pillar of Cloud by day — even then we must pay attention to those small details that govern our interpersonal conduct and even to the proper way to interact with a non-Jew who comes to conduct business (ibid.).

Daily life is filled with a thousand interactions — the waitress at the chasunah the doctor’s secretary the salesman at the shoe store Bubby’s live-in Filipino. At times these people are overlooked invisible even. But if these people can attest to our derech eretz our politeness and integrity then we have mastered the foundation upon which the Torah rests.

And then there are the demands of those near to us. The neighbors who complain about the noise a husband who wants to sit and eat dinner with his wife despite the mess and the children’s demands. The niece who phones as you’re running out to buy milk asking you to daven that her madrichah find a shidduch.

These are not mitzvos. They aren’t obligations or prohibitions. They are not hechsherim of the highest standards complex halachos of Shabbos or even social obligations. They are small simple acts. But they demonstrate good middos and derech eretz.

The loftiest spiritual levels are reached through small deeds — actions do not even fall into the category of explicit mitzvos or clear prohibitions. They simply represent proper conduct toward one’s fellow man toward one’s spouse and toward one’s household. The Torah enjoins us to “take counsel from elders” even about matters that do not pertain to halachah because that is simple derech eretz. And derech eretz is the prerequisite of any journey toward perfection.

It is not only the big things or the challenges that build us. Greatness comes from conducting ourselves properly caring about everyone — everyone — and tucking blankets around those who try to take advantage of us.

Only from our daily lives.