At night, without knowing the happy ending, without being able to imagine a ray of light, without understanding the kindness, let us just believe

“To give thanks and praise to Your great Name” (Al HaNissim)

Chazal added two holidays during the winter months a period that alludes to the exile: Chanukah and Purim. These two festivals were instituted as a result of events that occurred during the exile and are intended to help us survive the exile with belief we will experience the Redemption.

The decrees of the Greeks were aimed at harming the neshamah to uproot emunah and bitachon from the Jewish People. That is why the festival of Chanukah was established to fortify us against such an onslaught. So that we once again can “give thanks and praise to Your great Name.” (Rabbi Chaim Friedlander Sifsei Chaim)

These days I am scared to open the newspaper. I don’t want to see the stark headlines jumping out heralding yet another tragedy in our midst. Innocent babies young children yeshivah bochurim have been torn from us before experiencing life. Our gedolim have been plucked from before us our nashim tzidkaniyos have dwindled.

Our tiny country is buffeted by the winds of unrest. Our lifestyle is threatened by politics and assimilation.

It seems like the volcanoes of life are erupting while our support system is eroding. How can we go on?

Our task during the days of Chanukah is to strengthen ourselves in emunah by contemplating the miracles that Hashem did. He delivered “the strong into the hands of the weak the many into the hands of the few the impure into the hands of the pure the wicked into the hands of the righteous and the evil into the hands of those who study Your Torah.” The lights burned for eight days catapulting the Jewish Nation above nature. Through this one can learn emunah.

The highest level of emunah is not as people tend to think when a person has faith even without understanding. Rather as my teacher the gaon Rav Dessler ztz”l explained the word “emunah” is derived from the term “eimun ” i.e. reliance on the faithfulness of Hashem. (ibid.)

Sometimes the darkness creeps inside of me. Lines of black clouds cover the horizon; tremendous fear and darkness fall over me. There are days when I become so small and helpless and the gloom before me is filled with terrifying images. As in a nightmare I’m not even able to call for help. It’s too much; everything is closing in on me.

I feel painful salty tears as I weep in the darkness. Where is the light at the end of the tunnel?

True emunah in Hashem does not result from proofs and evidence. On the contrary a person who needs to find proof for his emunah has a deficiency in his belief. It is permissible to analyze and try to understand the ways of Hashem only after one masters emunah.

The miracle of emunah came about during exile to teach us the concept of “Your faith in the night.” Every moment Hashem performs miracles for us and conducts our lives beyond the bounds of nature whether we can see these miracles or not. Only as a result of this do the Jewish People continue to live.

The squares of glass in the windows of the homes are no longer quite so black. Suddenly little flames of light are flickering in the windows. On this night the winter has no power. “Only at night” whispers the flame “only at night is it possible to light a candle of emunah.”

All the proofs come in the morning. Thousands of kindnesses and miracles that we never understood. In the morning everyone rubs their eyes in astonishment and says: Now I see Hashem.

But at night without knowing the happy ending without being able to imagine a ray of light without understanding the kindness let us just believe. Let us believe that He is here with us crowded in the darkness even if we see nothing. Let us simply believe in Hashem and His infinite love. Not in spite of the darkness but because of it.

That is the story of this candle and the story of Chanukah. At night we have emunah.

(Originally featured in Family First, Issue 271)