“The days of the years of my sojours are 130 years” replied Yaakov. “The days of my life have been few and bad. I did not live as long as my fathers did in the days of their sojourns.”
(Bereishis 47:9)

Chazal tell us that when Yaakov said the days of his life had been “few and bad” Hashem said to him “I saved you from Lavan and Eisav and I returned Dina to you as well as Yosef yet you’re complaining that your days were ‘few and bad.…’ The number of years equal to the number of words from va’yomer [he said] until b’yemei megureihem [in the days of their sojourns] will be subtracted from your life so you won’t live as long as your father Yitzchak.’ ” There are 33 words in that pasuk and that number of years was subtracted from Yaakov’s life; Yitzchak lived 180 years and Yaakov lived only 147.
Certainly wherever Yaakov Avinu went the World to Come went with him and wherever he arrived Gan Eden came with him. We certainly cannot imagine that Yaakov Avinu’s frame of mind was one of embitterment over his situation. But even in his state of otherworldly bliss he still needed to avoid uttering something improper and Chazal say that he was faulted for saying his days were “few and bad ” for Hashem doesn’t do anything bad. That was Yaakov’s error and for that he was punished. (Rav Dovid Povarsky Yishmeru Daas)
Tovi one of my coworkers has a grandmother who’s a Holocaust survivor. Her grandmother lived through it all: the ghetto the aktions the camps the torture the starvation the epidemics and the deaths of her entire family.
She began her life anew here in Eretz Yisrael all alone with no experience no assistance no family. She made it through all those difficulties building a beautiful family. And whenever one of her granddaughters entered shidduchim Tovi’s grandmother would take her to Meron to daven at Rabi Shimon’s grave.
One day it was Tovi’s turn. The two entered the gravesite and agreed to meet in an hour. “Ask for everything Tovi ” her grandmother told her. Tovi did just that: She davened for the home she’d build for the children who would be born for her family’s financial success for all her lofty aspirations. The hour went by very quickly. Tovi felt that she’d only just touched the tip of a massive gate.
“Nu Toivale ” her grandmother said “did you daven?”
“Yes ” Tovi said. “I asked Hashem for everything. I don’t think I forgot a thing. Thank you Savta for this opportunity.”
Then Tovi asked curiously “Savta what did you ask for?”
Her grandmother thought for a moment then said hesitantly “I don’t think I had time to ask for anything.”
“But Savta!” Tovi exclaimed. “What did you do for a whole hour? I saw you davening!”
“Nu ” said the elderly woman who’d lost her whole family and suffered so many horrors “I had so much to give thanks for that I had no time to ask for anything.”
When Tovi told me this I cried. Even now as I’m writing this tears are coming to my eyes.
Life can be difficult. But life is never bad. Someone has planned our entire life just for us without leaving a single detail to “chance.” His plan sometimes calls for difficulties pain or suffering. But it’s always the best possible plan for us designed with infinite Divine mercy.
Tovi’s grandmother had a life plan. She survived the war and saw that Hashem had been merciful. She established her home and her family through many tribulations and saw Hashem’s helping Hand. She saw her children following the path of Torah marrying and having their own children and then those children getting married. It was all chesed from Hashem. What was there to ask for in Meron when her life was in the most loving and compassionate Hands? She wanted only to express her enormous gratitude.
I want to attach myself to that approach to never forget — when things are difficult or painful — that life is never bad. It may be hard but it’s never bad.
How could it be? I’m in the best of Hands.