When illness strikes it’s not just your body that needs tending to but also your emotions

Hashem gives each person the challenges that best fit the requirements of his or her soul. Some people will benefit from money troubles some from marriage struggles some from parenting difficulties and some from health issues. (Of course some people will benefit from more than one kind of challenge!)

While one’s intellect can appreciate the fact that Hashem does everything for the good one’s emotions can take a hit: many personal struggles feel really bad. The biggest challenge of all can be the battle to create a cord from the brain to the heart so that one both recognizes and feels Hashem’s loving guidance during times of hardship.

Health Concerns

Health concerns affect everyone — at different times and in dramatically different ways. Sometimes there is physical pain or discomfort to contend with; sometimes there is emotional anguish. There may be a lengthy frustrating search for the right doctors medicines or treatments. There can be hefty financial costs that strain the family budget.

Even when everything is in place the course of healing is not always smooth or predictable. There can be complications and setbacks. Apart from minor colds flus breaks and abrasions the illnesses we humans face are still largely mysterious. Whether mental or physical in nature many modern diseases still challenge both patients and healers. In fact that’s one of the reasons that illness can inspire such a close relationship with Hashem: There is often nowhere else to turn.

Entering Another World

One particular consequence of illness that is not often discussed is the resultant isolation that is so often part and parcel of the healing journey. Having a health issue makes a person different. Even though thousands of other people may have the same illness these folks are not usually living in one’s own family one’s school or place of work or even in one’s immediate community. And even if one encounters someone with a problem of the same name it can never be exactly the same problem.

As a result those suffering with illness often feel alone. They know that the people in their lives don’t really know what it’s like for them. They also know that they can’t complain nonstop even if their pain or limitations confront them nonstop; people have limits as to how much they can comfortably listen to medical details. And even the good listener can’t really understand the experience nor can the speaker adequately put it into words. The fear worry exhaustion and despair that may accompany illness are equally unspeakable — others have nothing to say that can relieve the distress. Many sufferers go silent after awhile keeping their intense experience inside of themselves — sharing it only in their tears to Hashem.

Out of Step

Depending on the nature of the illness it sometimes happens that one’s life is dramatically impacted. Sometimes this is due to the symptoms and consequences of the condition itself other times it is the result of necessary medical treatment and often it is a combination of both. However the result can be that the sufferer must “step out of line ” moving away from the activities of the peer group. A youngster may have to miss weeks or months of school — or may have to be removed from regular classes for some period altogether. A teenager may be separated from her friends an adult may have to leave his or her outside activities in order to recover. Meanwhile it seems that everyone else is marching along doing what they’re supposed to be doing at each stage of life. The ill person has stepped out of line.

Faith and Courage

Those who have been chosen to deal with illness need powerful strategies to help them avoid despair anxiety and anger. The helplessness frustration and often overwhelming challenges of illness can push a person to his or her limit creating both an emotional and spiritual crisis. It therefore becomes essential to learn what others might consider to be optional: How to be grateful for what one has how to be appreciative for daily small blessings how to trust that Hashem has a plan. Indeed it helps to become a master of emunah and bitachon — to study the texts to immerse oneself in prayer and Tehillim. One must ironically work hard to facilitate the positive attitudes of simchah optimism and joy that are known to contribute to the healing of body and mind.

Coping well with the challenge of illness involves becoming happy strong courageous positive appreciative and full of deep faith. The journey toward acquiring such traits is not fast or easy. Those who arrive there however often send back word that they are grateful for everything — including even the illness that put them on the road in the first place.