“I am not. Asking. Dad. For anything.” Benny breathed in, then out, but his jaw remained clenched

Benny made sure to show up 15 minutes early to second seder. He put his hat in its usual spot and knocked on the door of the rosh yeshivah’s room.

“Come in,” came the voice.

Benny walked in and carefully closed the door behind him. This had to work.

“Ah, it’s Benny Muller,” the rosh yeshivah said. His lips turned up into a smile, but his watery blue eyes remained emotionless. “Everything okay? Second seder going well?”

“Yes, pretty well,” Benny said. The Rosh hadn’t invited him to pull up a seat. Should he just sit down anyway? It felt pretty awkward to be standing there, like a first-year guy caught misbehaving. “We have a little issue with one chavrusa-shaft, but hopefully we’ll work it out.”

“I hear.” The Rosh had never been the type to get involved in chavrusa politics. He left those things to Reb Motti and the support staff.

The silence stretched. Benny squirmed.

“So, I wanted to ask the Rosh Yeshivah something,” he finally said.

The Rosh raised an eyebrow. Benny took that as permission to speak.

“Baruch Hashem, I really have a great relationship with the guys,” he said. “Not only in the beis medrash — they come over to my house all the time for Shabbos meals. We have big meals, like eight or even ten guys at a time, and my wife and I work hard to give them a good experience.

“It’s a lot of cooking and serving and clearing,” he explained, “but my wife feels like it’s important. For a lot of these guys, my apartment is almost an extension of Ner Olam. And they see me as much more than a shoel u’meishiv. They come to me for chizuk, for advice, for help with relationships…”

These were the words he’d rehearsed the entire bein hasedorim — mention Tziporah working hard, mention the big meals, mention the chizuk he gave the guys, explain how the yeshivah benefited from his dedication.

The Rosh Yeshivah pursed his lips. “That’s very nice of you and your rebbetzin,” he said coolly. “I’m sure the boys appreciate it.”

Nice of us? Benny wanted to scream. Nice? We’re the secret sauce of Ner Olam, giving our money and time and dining room to your yeshivah, your boys!