Rav Meir Chodosh was the ultimate mashgiach, and never stopped looking for an opportunity to train and teach his students

After I wrote a story about the famed Chevroner Mashgiach, Rav Meir Chodosh zichrono livrachah, someone shared it with his grandson, Rav Ben Zion (Benny) Chodosh. In return, he shared another story that perfectly depicted his grandfather.

Rav Meir was the ultimate mashgiach, and he never stopped looking for an opportunity to train and teach his students. One time, two bochurim in the Chevron yeshivah, excellent students who were very diligent in their learning, decided to spend the entire Friday night learning together in the beis medrash. They sat down at the front of the beis medrash, one in the Mashgiach’s seat and the other in the seat belonging to one of the roshei yeshivah. As they learned, they shared a big bag of garinim (seeds).

Early in the morning, the Mashgiach came into the beis medrash. When the boys saw him, the one who was sitting in his seat startled, and they both quickly got up and left. Only once they had left the beis medrash did the bochurim realize they had left all their garinim shells behind in the Mashgiach’s shtender. Feeling mortified, they waited for the Mashgiach to call them over, sure he would give them a strong mussar talk about chutzpah or bad middos.

Shabbos morning, the bochurim were embarrassed to approach the Mashgiach, but when they walked past him, he didn’t say anything but his usual warm good Shabbos. They were convinced that the Mashgiach would surely reprimand them before Rosh Hashanah, but Rosh Hashanah came and went and still the Mashgiach said nothing. Eventually, they forgot all about the incident and assumed the Mashgiach had as well.

Five years later, one of the bochurim got engaged. On the day of his chasunah, he went to the Mashgiach to invite him to the wedding. The Mashgiach greeted him warmly, invited him to sit down, and then told him he wanted to give him a piece of advice.

“You are getting married,” he said. “If you would like to eat garinim at the table, please make sure that you throw the shells in the garbage and you don’t leave it for your wife to do.”

The bochur was flabbergasted.

“It’s five years later,” he said. “Why did the Mashgiach wait five years to say anything to me? Why now?”

“I’ll tell you why now,” the Mashgiach answered. “Now you are getting married, and maybe one day your wife will do something that you don’t approve of or don’t appreciate. I showed you that you can wait five years before saying anything.”

When his grandson got married, Rav Meir shared this lesson with him as well. You can wait even five years before telling someone off. It was an incredible lesson in shalom bayis from an incredible person.

(Originally featured in Mishpacha, Issue 1089)