| No Fail |

Fay’s Story    

  I had a moment of clarity. “I want to share the power of inner work with other frum women,” I said

I remember the moment the realization hit me:

I’m just not good at sales. It felt like coming out of a dark room into the blinding light.

I’d been on a sales call, speaking to a potential client, trying to sell him an “all-in-one” package. I was offering to write his emails and set up the tech in the background to make sure each email was being sent to the right customer at the right time. I thought it was a pretty good deal, but the guy on the line apparently didn’t. I was using a sales script, trying to follow what I was “supposed to say,” and he wasn’t buying it.

“You’ve asked me enough questions,” he said gruffly. “Would you like to tell me how you can help me?”

Whoa! I felt like I’d just been punched in the gut, and I struggled to get to my feet again. Shame rose from my stomach to my face. Somehow, I fumbled through the rest of the conversation, but I realized then that I just couldn’t get the sales thing down pat, even with the script — and that without it, I was lost.

I started to question my whole career path.

But I’m getting ahead of myself; let me back up.

When it came time to enter the workforce, I couldn’t figure out which field to go into. None seemed particularly appealing, at least not the popular ones my friends were choosing. After speaking to a career coach and outlining all my strengths, I settled on special education. I’m good with kids, I thought. I’ve made day camps for many years. I’m sure special education will be a good fit for me.

I threw myself into it. I became a reading specialist, then a kriah specialist. I became certified in teaching dyslexic children to read. And I loved it… at least parts of it. I loved seeing the children’s eyes light up with understanding. I loved empowering them to push through their limitations and reach slightly higher than they thought possible.

But there were other parts of the job that just weren’t for me. I needed more growth, more independence; I wanted more room to do my own thing. I’d always been good at writing, so when my uncle mentioned he was looking for someone to write blog posts for his Amazon startup, I told him I’d be perfect for the job. I’d never written professionally, but I figured it couldn’t be too bad, and I jumped into the job with excitement.

That blog writing stint was soon over, and armed with exactly one sample, I pitched dozens of frum digital marketing agencies to hire me. I found them on Google, located the appropriate email address, attached my sample to a carefully worded email, and sent my pitch off to cyberspace.

Most companies didn’t answer me. But three of them did. And one of them hired me. I officially had a job in digital marketing.

I worked there for a while, and when that job petered out, I decided to go out on my own. I figured that my familiarity with email marketing platforms, coupled with my writing skills, would create an irresistible package for business owners. I could write and send their marketing emails — it was a one-stop-shop. I put up my shingle and was officially “in business.”

But I couldn’t get the sales thing. I kept getting no after no. I was putting in so much effort to find leads, but too few of them were turning into actual paying clients. I would get on the sales call with sweaty palms and a nervous pit in my stomach. It was stressful, it was difficult, and no matter what I tried, I wasn’t closing enough sales to meet my income goals.

While I officially had a business, everyone knows that if you don’t have clients… well, you don’t have a business.

I had no idea what I was doing wrong.

Fast forward a few more careers, where I tried my hand at a website copywriting business and a personal branding business… all with similar results.

Finally, I had a conversation that changed my life.

I was on the phone with a coach when she asked me a question I’ll never forget: “What do you really, really want?” I’d been telling her how I kept pivoting, how I just couldn’t close sales even though I was already on my third business venture. “What’s going on?” I asked her. “Why do I keep switching paths — and why can’t I close sales no matter which path I choose?”

That’s when she popped the question. What do you really, really want?

Then she stopped talking. And waited.

No one had ever asked me that before. When I got quiet, and really let myself come up with the answer, I had a moment of clarity. “I want to share the power of inner work with other frum women,” I said.

I’d always been interested in the tremendous role our mindset plays in how we experience life. The entire personal development field was fascinating to me, and I’d been reading about it for years. I had a wealth of information and knowledge inside of me that I used in my personal life on a daily basis. But I’d never thought it could become my career.

“Are frum women into this? There’s so much education that needs to happen… everyone is so focused on strategy, numbers, and ROI. Are people even going to recognize this for what it is?” I wondered.

There were a whole lot of limiting beliefs running haywire around my brain. But I finally made a decision. “Enough is enough. Enough doing things that don’t light me up. Enough trying to make sales by ‘convincing’ people. I’m ready to do something different. I’m ready to speak from my heart. I’m ready to do something I’m passionate about and let that passion lead the way.”

And that’s what I did. It was scary — really scary — but that decision changed my life.

I became a coach, specifically a mindset coach, helping women understand the internal blocks holding them back. It’s amazing how, when we work on the core level to reprogram limiting beliefs that are keeping us small, everything changes.

Instead of changing our strategy, we’re changing ourselves. By choosing empowering beliefs, refining our thought patterns, and creating an entirely new self-image, we change who we are. We show up with rock-solid confidence, opportunity flows our way, and we can expand beyond what we believed to be possible.

I started sharing this work with other frum women. And when I did that, everything changed. It was all finally working — and it was so much easier than I thought. Baruch Hashem, clients were excited to work with me, referrals flowed in, and I didn’t have to do nearly as much marketing. I needed no scripts, no step-by-step strategies. I realized that sales had never been the core problem at all. I was now so passionate about helping people that it wasn’t about me anymore. I wasn’t trying to convince anyone to use my services — I was just trying to help them. And that made all the difference.

When women ask me about entrepreneurship, I always tell them about my biggest business mistake — offering the services I thought would be the most marketable, without taking into account what I was passionate about. When I chose a career path that didn’t resonate with me simply because I thought it would bring in clients, it was a losing battle. I myself wasn’t totally, 100 percent behind what I was selling — so why would anyone else be? My potential clients were picking up on my subtle lack of enthusiasm and confidence in what I was providing.

Looking back, my windy career path served me tremendously — it taught me the power of passion, and it enables me to help other women honor the whispering of their souls over the noise of the marketplace.


If I could tell my younger self one thing, it would be

Don’t try to contort yourself to fit into a role that’s not really yours. Have the courage to ask yourself what it is you really want to do — even when the answer might be difficult to hear. Even when it might mean starting again or doing something you never expected to do. Have the courage to ask the question — because when you do something you love, the passion in your heart speaks for itself

Today, I spread this message to so many other women. Women who feel stuck. Women who feel a burning desire to impact, to spread their unique gifts to the world. Women who want to live lives with more expansion, purpose, and joy.

Together, we explore what it is that’s holding them back and keeping them small — in their businesses and in their lives. We work from the inside-out to raise their self-image, to get them 100 percent behind what they’re offering, to replace fear with courage, and doubt with confidence. And when we do that, well… everything changes.

The results are dramatic, but not because we’re trying harder or working more. We’re working in a completely different way — working from the core, changing who we are. And when you work like that — there’s no way things can’t change for you.

My intention for this column is to bring you real stories, just like mine — stories of hardships, mistakes, and challenges that successful, frum female entrepreneurs have encountered as they’ve grown their businesses. You’ll get a behind-the-scenes look at the part most people don’t talk about. The times we’ve failed. The times that aren’t “pretty.” The times we thought we should just give up.

And you’ll see how these amazing women got up again, how they used their mistakes to redirect themselves, and how they — together with all of those around them — have grown stronger as a result. Entrepreneurship is a journey that’s exciting, exhilarating, full of potential and possibilities. It also involves failure, fear, and real internal struggles.

Together, we’ll pull back the curtain, give you the inside story — and hopefully leave you with more confidence, grit, and courage to face the times in your own life when things don’t go the way you thought they would.

This is a column for entrepreneurs, but it’s not only a column for entrepreneurs. Because fear of failure, fear of rejection, feelings of self-doubt or unworthiness… these are struggles everyone experiences. We’re all more alike than different.

I hope you’ll enjoy the journey,



Fay Dworetsky is a mindset coach who helps women work from the inside-out to open up to so much more possibility, expansion, and abundance — both in their businesses and in their lives.


My mission statement

I’m on a mission to help Jewish women change their mindset and self-image to experience more abundance, joy, and expansion — in their businesses and in

their lives.


Favorite business book

I’m a voracious reader, so I don’t know if I can pick one favorite, but I always recommend You2 by Price Pritchett. It’s just 38 pages (!) and gives you a great introductory understanding of how inner work works.


Favorite snack while working

A mint-flavored green tea alongside a handful of walnuts and a Medjool date. Yum!


(Originally featured in Family First, Issue 783)

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