Every Day a Birthday
| August 15, 2017P haraoh must not have known the words to the “Happy Birthday” song. Instead of asking “How old are you now?” when he met Yaakov Avinu he questioned “How many are the days of the years of your life?” Rav Hirsch sees this not as a clumsy choice of words but as an indication of the deep impression Yaakov made on Pharaoh.
Units of measure typically reflect the nature of the commodity they describe. Coffee is measured in teaspoons the work day is quantified by hours a road trip is reckoned in miles and age is enumerated in years. Pharaoh and Yaakov however speak of days and years. “The days of the years of my sojourning are 130 years ” Yaakov replied “[but] the days of the years of my life have been few….”
Yaakov Avinu was able to recount his life in days — because he made each day count. In Rav Hirsch’s words: “Only a few select people value each day and see it as a special mission. A true human being does not live years but days.”
When the Torah describes a person as zakein old it’s a title of honor the Shelah says for it means he lived each day to its fullest. By contrast a wicked person may be biologically aged but spiritually juvenile because so few of his days were worthwhile. In his modesty Yaakov told Pharaoh that his days of sojourning on earth were 130 but his days of living were few.
Yet in fact his days were many. The Torah informs us “And the days of Yaakov neared death (Bereishis 47:29).” The Zohar explains that at death the days of a person’s life return to the upper world together with the neshamah; if they have been used properly the days stand before Hashem in joy and are not rejected. This insight explains a similar statement about Avraham Avinu: “And Avraham was zakein old ba bayomim he arrived with the days” (Bereishis 24 1).
As we journey through life what attitudes and perspectives do we need to adopt in order to “arrive with all our days” at our final destination?
Recognizing the Potential of Each Day
First we must recognize that our days are not a mere framework for our activities; they are a reality a creation of Hashem. Based on the verse “Yom l’yom yabia omer each day speaks to the other (Tehillim 19:3) ” the Mezritcher Maggid asserts that the day actually glorifies itself and boasts about the righteous deeds that were performed during its hours. Each day is a separate reality that rejoices when its mission is accomplished properly.
In a similar vein the Midrash Tanchuma notes that the 365 prohibitions of the Torah correspond to the 365 days of the solar calendar and explains that each morning the sun rises and exhorts mankind not to devastate its day with sin.
Second rather than regarding our lives as a monochromatic parade of days we must recognize the distinct and separate potential of every successive day. “Blessed are You Hashem Who by His word maariv aravim brings on evenings and with wisdom poseiach shearim opens gates.” The Sfas Emes writes that this opening to tefillas Maariv praises Hashem for bringing on the evening so that He can open new gates —of enlightenment and wisdom —at dawn. In other words the reason for night is to end each day and begin another different one.
If life is a journey then we indeed find ourselves in a new place every day. We are reborn in a setting that offers new possibilities opportunities and adventures. In this sense every day is a birth-day!
The Ozhorover Rebbe in a stunning observation points out that this concept of viewing each day as a separate entity is reflected in seven verses of Tanach that share an identical phrase and punctuation. Fascinatingly each of these seven pesukim contain the words “yom yom day after day” with a vertical cantillation mark inserted between them indicating that the second “day” is distinct and separate from the first “day.”
One of these verses refers to the mahn: “Yilkitu yom yom they gathered it daily” (Shemos 16:5). The mahn that fell anew every morning from the heavens during the 40-year Midbar journey is perhaps the best illustration that every single day is a separate unit. As Chazal put it “He who created the day will create its sustenance” (Mechilta parshas Beshalach). The desert generation saw clearly that each dawn brings with it the resources needed for that day.
The distinct nature of each day is also referenced in the verse that tells of the attempts of Potiphar’s wife to attract the attention of Yosef Hatzaddik. “And she spoke to Yosef yom yom (Bereishis 39:10) on a daily basis.” She employed new and different methods each day; in a similar vein our tempter the yetzer hara renews its energy and strategy each day.
To fight this formidable enemy the Torah recommends that we too renew ourselves each day in tefillah and Torah study. “And you shall seek Me yom yom” (Tehillim 61:9); “And I [the Torah] was a delight yom yom” (Mishlei 8:30); “Happy is the man who is diligent at my gates yom yom” (Mishlei 8:34).
To facilitate our efforts Kedushas Levi writes each morning Hashem bestows upon us newfound clarity and perception above and beyond that which we attained yesterday. Thus we can fulfill the imperative of “Baruch Hashem yom yom” (Tehillim 68:20) of serving Him daily with renewed vitality and passion.
In a similar vein Nefesh HaChaim asserts that “from the time our tefillos were written until the coming of Mashiach there never was and never will be a tefillah that resembles another; each is essentially different and produces unique results. Similarly no one day resembles another that preceded or followed it.”
Ohr HaChaim (Bereishis 47:29) explores the relationship between the days and the life span of a person based on the writings of the Arizal. He too borrows a phrase from the parshas hamahn: “D’var yom b’yomo.” Each day’s portion fell on that day and after Bnei Yisrael collected it the rest melted and disappeared. Moreover they were not allowed to save any portions from one day to the next.
The “portion of each day” can also describe the particular mission of each day in a person’s life. The neshamah is divided into fragments or sparks and they correspond precisely to the number of days in the person’s lifetime. These sparks represent his life’s missions; each day of his life he is charged with a singular task.
If the person is successful in fulfilling his task of the day that fragment of his soul has reached completion. When his neshamah rises to the upper world that night the fragment is set apart from the rest of his neshamah so that it remains pure and unaffected by any future failures. (It is for this reason that sleep is considered a semblance of death.) If he misses the opportunity of the day it is lost to him because the next day is a different entity with another mission.
These truths apply equally to leisure days such as summer break vacation time and bein hazmanim. Rav Yaakov Kamenetsky ztz”l once remarked that although bein hazmanim (semester break in yeshivos) literally means “between times ” it should be viewed instead as “a zeman of bein hazmanim ” as a semester of its own for there is no such thing as “non-time.” Similarly expressions such as empty time waiting time and killing time are all misnomers.
Live for Now Not What’s Next
The third attitude that allows us to take full advantage of the unique gift of each day is to “live in the moment.” In my early years of motherhood my role of camera-toting picture-snapping mother at school parties and performances came to an end one day when I attended my young child’s graduation. I realized after the event that I never really “saw” him receive his diploma because I was too busy focusing my camera. In my zeal to capture the moment for posterity I was missing the moment in real time. From that day on I left my camera at home.
The promotion of mindfulness did not originate in the 21st century. The Gra famously declared that when a person sits before his Gemara he should imagine that “I’m the only person in the world I only have this hour of life and there is only this one daf Gemara to learn.” Imagine how he’d concentrate on the task at hand!
In the words of Rav Hirsch: “Today he is strong today he will act undisturbed by what tomorrow may bring. This day is reckoned for the sake of G-d and will never be lost.” If we’re constantly thinking “What’s next?” we’re not living in the present and we’re not using the moment to its fullest potential. And ironically when what’s next finally does arrive we won’t be there either because we’ll be worrying about the moment after that.
As Rav Chaim Friedlander points out the older generation tends to ruminate about the past while the youth fantasize about the future. Both groups miss the opportunities of the present. We can only maximize life’s potential when we realize that every part of our journey is significant each moment is momentous every hour an occasion and every single day — yom yom — has singular value. Dovid Hamelech pleaded “Limnos yameinu kein hoda teach us to count our days” (Tehillim 90:12).
Finally our approach to each new day should be more than recognition of an unprecedented opportunity. We must celebrate the uniqueness of the day. Human beings revel in new beginnings and indeed our morning routine and prayers reflect the delight one should have upon waking up and witnessing a new day with new eyes. We begin the morning with the words of Modeh Ani which are based on the passage (Eichah 3:23) “Chadashim labekorim raba emunasecha new every morning how great is Your faithfulness.” We wash negel vasser as if we are Kohanim sanctifying our hands at the laver before beginning the morning service in the Beis Hamikdash.
When we thank Hashem for the rooster who crows in the morning to herald the new day we are in effect blessing our alarm clock! The birchos hashachar morning blessings reflect the wonder of a person who unwraps the gift of his own birth and discovers himself and the richness of his potential. We savor our identity as a Jew and a free person we thank Hashem for our gender we acknowledge our eyes our limbs our freedom of movement our ability to walk and we take note of the firm earth that will support our journey of today.
Years ago I taught in a kiruv school and sat with a new student and a siddur open to the first page Modeh Ani. “What is this?” she asked in bewilderment. “What’s the point of reciting these words each morning?”
I answered her with a question. “When you were a child was it exciting to celebrate your birthday? Do you remember looking forward to it and counting down the days? And when you finally woke up that morning do you remember what it felt like? You were just so happy to be alive to have arrived at that day!”
I paused for dramatic effect. “This is how a Jew feels every morning. Grateful special — he may be only one day older but it’s his birthday!”
And if each birth-day is recognized differentiated utilized and celebrated — then we are promised many happy returns.
Sources include writings of Rav Chaim Friedlander the Slonimer Rebbe and Rav Moshe Shapira. Mrs. Shani Mendlowitz is a teacher at Bais Yaakov Seminary in Montreal and is a popular lecturer for adults. (Originally featured in Family First Issue 555)
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