The best we can ever do is to focus on becoming the best version of ourselves within our present circumstances

Hi,

I grew up with a stay-at-home, milk-and-cookies mom, and I want to be able to give the same to my kids. When my friends are discussing which fields they plan to work in, I seem to be the only one who has no interest in the topic. I really enjoy being home, taking care of children, and spending time with friends. Honestly, I know that once I start raising a family, I’ll stop working anyway. The way I see it, any job to pass the time until then is fine.

Does it really matter what I do temporarily?

Seminary Graduate

Your question is a wonderful one, based on wanting to provide your future children the same childhood experience you were given and your natural passion to emulate the role model you found in your own mother. I do hope that this vision of your own future family comes true for you. In the meantime, though, going out into the next stage of life without any goals or plans whatsoever is… not a great plan.

You see, what you do “temporarily” actually does matter very much. Simply because:

1. You have no idea how long this temporary state will last.
2. How you spend your time should never be solely “to pass the time.”
3. A decision like this may have long-term ramifications.

Meet Malky, an acquaintance of mine who shared your aspirations. She spent a few years working in a boring office job that didn’t use many of her amazing talents, while she waited to walk down the aisle toward her real job. At the same time, her personality suffered as she became unhappier with her situation — which didn’t help her marriage prospects, either.

Eventually, she did get married and is now raising her family — but still needs to work part-time to contribute to the household income. Unfortunately, she is stuck in a low-earning position, since she did not focus on developing any marketable skills.