Chaya Hinda Allen empowers women to change their thoughts — and change their lives

It Takes a Village

Liverpool is a tiny Jewish community — quintessential small-town living.

That’s where I got my first experience in how communities work. My father was the treasurer of the local cheder, my mother raised funds to support Israel, and my aunt was the treasurer for the local community center, which was the hub of our lives. I starred in plays there from the age of six, and was either a camper or counselor there each summer. As a teen, I was a representative on its Board of Governors.

After seminary, I stayed in Israel and settled there. My young family was one of the first English-speaking families to move to Beitar. I worked for a seminary while my husband learned.

Realizing that the English-speaking women were lonely and disconnected, the rav of the neighborhood asked me to form a Neshei, so they’d have a support network. After I experienced a minor medical crisis — my fifth child was hospitalized at three weeks with a double ear infection — I saw how difficult these emergencies could be for women without family support, so we branched out to helping families in crisis, creating a fund to help them with meals and childcare.

We put on plays every other year to fund our work, which was also a fun way for women to socialize and relax together. I acted in each of them — usually as the villain.

Turning Point

Thirteen years after we moved to Beitar, I experienced a major personal trauma. Feeling hopeless and lost, I needed answers. As involved as I’d been in creating community networks, when I suffered this massive shock, I had no idea where to turn.

I tried various hashkafah and self-help classes, but didn’t find what I was looking for. One day, after yet another shiur that just didn’t do it for me, the lecturer passed around a flier for a class by Rabbanit Sarah Yosef, the daughter-in-law of Chacham Ovadiah, who was speaking about positive thinking. My interest was piqued, and I made the three-hour round trip to Bnei Brak to hear her.

The Rabbanit had a message unlike any I’d heard before. She described how we could change our reality by taking control of our thoughts — and that Hashem responds to our thoughts and feelings of emunah, even if our life circumstances remained the same. The helplessness, she explained, was just a feeling, not a reality.

Until I heard the Rabbanit speak, I never realized the power we wield through our thoughts, speech, and imagination. I hadn’t known that my feelings reflect my thoughts, and that by changing how I thought, I could change how I felt, which would in turn change my life.