“Mrs. Resnick,” I said, when she ran out of air. “I hear how worried you are, and it’s totally normal for your mind to conjure up all kinds of scenarios in a situation like this. Let’s see if we can figure this out logically, together. I know Yosef well. He’s a wonderful boy. He’s a mensch and has beautiful middos. You told me last week you heard glowing reports about him, right?”

“Right,” she said faintly.

“My guess is that the date was going so well that Yosef and Rina just lost track of time. Don’t worry, she’s in good hands. I’m sure she’ll be home soon. Meanwhile, I’ll try to call him.”

I called, no answer; I texted him and got no reply.

I’d seen this happen before — a first date that goes so unnaturally well that the couple is oblivious to the clock. It’s not common, but it does happen. I hoped that was the case here.

I called Mrs. Resnick back. She sounded calmer, but still worried. Then we heard a door slam.

“I’m home!” Rina called.

“Baruch Hashem!” Mrs. Resnick said. “I’ll call you back soon!”

It was Rina who called me an hour later. “I’m so embarrassed,” she said. “My mother told me everything. You were right. I don’t know how you knew this, but we kind of really clicked, and we were just talking and talking, and we didn’t realize how late it was.”

“How’s your mother now?”

I could hear Rina’s grin. “What do you mean? I clicked with a guy! She’s thrilled.”

Rina sounded pretty thrilled herself. “Here, I’m giving the phone to my mother.”

I heard Mrs. Resnick laughing with Rina as she took the phone and wished her daughter a goodnight. “One sec,” she told me. “I’m just going into a different room.” After a moment she started talking again, but her tone had changed. “Mrs. Leiman, you were right, and Rina looks great. But there’s something she told me I find very disturbing.”

“Wait,” I said. “Don’t say it.”

“But…”

“Wait,” I repeated. “I want to tell you a story first, okay?”

“Uh… okay.”

“Once upon a time,” I started, “a couple went on their first date. Let’s call them… um… Avraham and Sara. Although first dates are usually short, this date lasted over six hours. Avraham and Sara were so absorbed in each other’s company that they both reported that it felt like just one hour. So, of course they would go out again, right?

“But there was something bothering Sara. And she knew that if she shared it with her parents, they would never allow her to meet Avraham again.”

“I…”

“Wait, I’m not done. What was bothering Sara? The fact that throughout the entire six-hour date, Avraham never offered her a drink. Sara knew that if her parents heard this, the shidduch would be over. But she’d really liked Avraham. She’d never connected like this with any other boy she’d met. Sara decided not to tell her parents what was bothering her. She figured she would watch Avraham closely on the next few dates to see whether he was considerate and sensitive to her needs.

“Over the next few dates, Sara paid close attention to Avraham’s character. On all their subsequent meetings, he bought her drinks or a meal as was appropriate and expected — and she knew it wasn’t just because the shadchan had told him to, because she hadn’t reported his lapse on the first date. She saw many examples of his kindness and consideration.”

“If he was so considerate,” Mrs. Resnick broke in, “then why didn’t he offer her a drink once on the entire six-hour first date?”

“Well, since Sara ended up marrying him, she actually got to ask him that question. He told her he was mortified when he realized he hadn’t bought her a drink. They’d been so caught up in their conversation that he’d simply forgotten. Twice it did occur to him, but he was afraid to break the flow of conversation that was going incredibly well. And after that he simply forgot.”

Mrs. Resnick let out a breath. “I hear,” she said. “You’re right. That’s exactly what happened. He didn’t buy her a drink. I guess it could be that he was just so caught up, like you said.”

“Mrs. Resnick,” I said. “Can you keep a secret?”

“Of course!”

“Six-hour first dates are not very common,” I admitted, “but I have seen it happen a few times. And once or twice even with this no-drink issue… uh, twist. And almost every single time — don’t tell this to Rina — almost every single time this happened, the couple ended up married.”

I heard a cross between a gasp and a laugh.

“Don’t tell Rina!” I repeated. “Let this be our secret and let’s see how things play out.”

Mrs. Resnick did keep the secret — until Yosef and Rina’s l’chayim. Then she told the glowing couple what I’d predicted, and they all enjoyed a laugh.

“I wonder how she knew,” Rina kept saying.

Well, here’s another little secret: “Avraham and Sara” are actually my husband and me.

to be continued…

Shani Leiman is a teacher, shadchan, and dating coach. She lives in Silver Spring, Maryland.

(Originally featured in Family First, Issue 736)