I wonder if the path is as lonely as I’ve been imagining, after all

As told to Rochel Samet

Twelfth grade advanced bio. Fun stuff.

Biology has actually become my favorite subject. Who would’ve guessed?

Today, Mrs. Strimber’s talking about joints, and what can cause joint issues.

Lupus, I think, but hold back.

“What’s that thing that old people get, you know...” someone calls out.

“Arthritis,” Chaviva says. “My grandmother has it pretty bad. Ouch,” she shudders.

I don’t stop to think. “It’s not only old people who get arthritis, you know,” I blurt out. “Kids can have it too.”

The class goes quiet. Tzirel Davis looks at me funny. “Really? Do you know any kids with arthritis?” Her tone is a little mocking.

Yes, I think, Me. Arthritis is a symptom of lupus. That’s why my wrists and knees get crazy when I have a flare.

But I don’t answer, just shrug and let my classmates debate the question.

“It’s true, girls.” Mrs. Strimber is smiling slightly. “Libby’s right. Arthritis is not limited to the elderly, although we tend to think of it that way.”

She continues talking, and I feel my cheeks cool again.

It’s okay, I tell myself. I have nothing to be ashamed of.

I leave the class feeling strangely at peace.

My life, I realize, is like a moonwalk. It’s about falling hard and bouncing back, about catching my breath and riding the waves, it’s a story of resilience and strength, of despair and triumph, of courage and hope.

It’s about finding the silvery shine of moonlight in the ups and downs of a journey on a lonely path.

Then I wonder if the path is as lonely as I’ve been imagining, after all.