We can’t plan. Not what tomorrow may look like, not what next month may look like

“I saw an upside down world.”

I walk through town in an effort to do some shopping. And I’m flooded with feelings and thoughts that have only recently entered my life. Three weeks ago I delivered a baby whose cries were not heard, rather mine were. Whose eyes were gently closed, not because he was asleep, but because he was lifeless.

Many stores are closed. Cafés and fast-food stores are opened, but tables are turned upside down, for you can only order to go. No sitting leisurely as we once took for granted.

The world as we know it has seemed to go crazy. Who would have guessed that in 2020 you would be unable to fly from one country to another? Who would have thought we may have to make Pesach alone, isolated from family and friends? Who would have imagined that America, queen of Western culture, has closed all entertainment venues?

“I saw an upside down world.”

As I see those overturned tables, reality hits me. The world is upside down. What we perceive as true may not be. What we think is right may be wrong.

I thought a pregnancy is a means to an end — bringing a child into this world. Building a family, raising, loving, teaching, giving.

I thought a café has tables so you can sit down and eat.

The certainty and clarity we thought we had is gone. We know this is part of a greater picture, a master plan. We’re all uttering the words “Hashem is clearly in control”.

Of course Hashem is in control. We lived our life close to Him, doing His Will. Yet now, as the future unravels, it becomes more and more clear that we have no idea what real life is. We have no clue what will happen in a week, a month, a year.

What will be the outcomes of this virus? Will I be fired? How long will it take for the world economy to recover? When will things go back to normal? Will they go back to normal?

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