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Making Meetings Matter  

Meetings devour time. And if we’re not careful, they don’t give enough back

“I just survived a meeting that should have been an email.” You’ve seen the mug. Maybe you’ve even chuckled at it — likely during a meeting.

But behind the humor lies a stark truth: Meetings devour time. And if we’re not careful, they don’t give enough back.

Time is precious — ask anyone juggling deadlines, demands, and endless details. Shlomo Hamelech captured this wisdom in Koheles: “Lakol zeman v’eis, for everything, there is a time.”

Zeman refers to the steady march of time — Shabbos arrives, seasons change, and the sun rises and sets without fail. Eis, however, is about timing, and our ability to use those moments wisely. Eis is about us making zeman count.

Meetings exist at the intersection of zeman and eis. They consume time — sometimes too much —but how we fill that time is what makes the difference. A well-run meeting can energize a team and shape the future. A poorly run one? It leaves you wishing for that mug.

In the next two columns, we’ll explore how to transform meetings from potential time-sinks into one of your team’s most valuable tools.

The Hidden Tab

A friend of mine worked at a publishing house where the team held a weekly meeting to sync on projects and priorities.

The meeting was generally productive, but the company’s accountant, with her sharp eye for numbers, couldn’t help herself. She’d tally up the start and end times, factor in the hourly rates of attendees, and at the close of each meeting, hand the editor-in-chief a “bill.”

“You just spent $XXX on this meeting,” she’d say. “Was it worth it?”

It’s an extreme approach, but it drives home a valuable point: Meetings aren’t free. Even when they’re useful, there’s always a cost — in wages, lost focus, or work that gets delayed. And when meetings drag on or lack direction, the cost is even steeper, often draining morale and productivity.

After one meeting at Temech, an untouched tray of mini sandwiches — which had cost NIS 150 (under $50) — remained. I felt a pang about the overbuy and found another use for them. Then it hit me: I was worried about wasted refreshments but hadn’t considered the far greater cost — the participants’ time, which can never be regained.

Meetings themselves aren’t the problem; the real issue is a lack of skill in running them. This is the premise of Meetings Suck (great book, bad name; Lioncrest Publishing) by Cameron Herold, a renowned business growth expert who built two $1 million companies by age 35 and now coaches CEOs globally. Effective, purposeful meetings align goals, spark creativity, and clear the path for decisive action.

Spot the Meeting Troll

We’ve all met them — the person who derails discussions and stalls progress. Meeting trolls are often subtle in their tactics, but Seth Godin, best-selling author and entrepreneur, highlights key signs to watch for so you can manage them — or avoid them altogether:

  • Endless Objections: Armed with a laundry list of “buts” and “what ifs,” they stall progress by overcomplicating even the simplest decisions.
  • The Blame Shifter: They never say “we” — it’s always “you.” This clever phrasing keeps responsibility at arm’s length.
  • Covering Their Tracks: They’re not rooting for failure, but they’ll leave a trail of evidence so they can dodge blame if things go south.
  • Meeting Addict: Despite claiming to hate meetings, they thrive on them. Meetings are their stage, and your best defense is to limit their invites.
  • The “No” Hunter: While others look for solutions, they excel at spotting reasons things won’t work.
  • Ghost Contributor: They’ll never call a meeting, pitch in with prep, or follow up, but they’ll eagerly lead the postmortem if things go wrong.
  • Silent Underminer: They rarely voice opposition but subtly undermine ideas with sighs, shrugs, or post-meeting doubt sessions.
  • Selective Historian: They’re quick to point out past failures — relevant or not — but conveniently forget previous wins.
  • Doubt Spreader: They don’t need to argue outright; they just raise enough questions to stall momentum.
  • Change-Averse: At their core, trolls aren’t malicious — they’re afraid of change. Their resistance is a misguided attempt to maintain the status quo.
The Collaboration Compass

In Israel, you need to take a driver’s ed refresher course two years after you get a license. I still recall one of the questions the instructor asked us: “What’s the first thing you need to do before you pass someone?”

Hands shot up with answers: “Signal!” “Check your mirrors!” “Slow down!” “Speed up!”

The instructor shook his head. “No,” he said. “The first thing is deciding if you should be passing altogether.”

Before you schedule a meeting, ask yourself the one question no one seems to ask: Is this meeting even necessary? If you’re sharing a quick update, an email might be all you need. If you’re clarifying something small, a one-on-one phone call could save everyone time. Consider if that’s the right route.

But if you determine that gathering a group is the best way forward, make sure to get the most out of this time. Cameron Herold breaks meetings into three core types:

  • Informational: Share updates, deliver knowledge, or align the team on policies. These are mostly one-way, with a little space for Q&A.
  • Decision-Making: Discuss options, weigh the pros and cons, and agree on a course of action. Only invite people who can meaningfully contribute to or finalize the decision.
  • Brainstorming: A creative free-for-all where ideas flow without judgment — at least in the early stages.

The trick is to stop lumping them all into the catch-all “meetings.” Instead, frame each with intent: “We’re finalizing the marketing strategy,” or “We’ll discuss tech requirements for next quarter.” With clarity upfront, attendees know whether to bring ideas, answers, or simply their focus.

An agenda is your meeting’s compass. It doesn’t need to be long — two or three bullet points will do — but it gives everyone a chance to prepare and sets the tone.

Once the meeting’s purpose is clear, the next step is to ensure it runs smoothly — and that’s where roles come in. Herold outlines three key roles for productive meetings.

Your Moderator keeps the conversation on track and ensures no one hogs the spotlight. Think of the moderator as your meeting’s conductor.

The Timekeeper is your guardian against the endless discussions that eat up precious minutes. He also ensures that all important topics get covered by giving everyone the heads-up when it’s time to wrap up one topic and move to the next.

Finally, your Closer ties everything together at the end, summing up what was decided and who’s doing what. He makes sure everyone walks out knowing exactly what needs to happen next. The most senior person or meeting organizer typically serves as the Closer.

In small teams, one person can wear multiple hats, but these roles can help keep your meeting focused.

The best managers recognize their strengths and weaknesses in meetings. Some excel at sparking ideas but struggle to deliver actionable takeaways, while others run highly efficient sessions that leave little room for innovation. The ideal approach blends structure with creativity.

If you lean toward creativity, bring in a coleader to keep the agenda on track. If you’re more task-focused, dedicate time for brainstorming or open-ended discussion to ensure your team feels heard and inspired.

At a company I consulted with, I was surprised to discover that the VP was the notetaker during meetings. Curious, I asked why — and the story emerged.

This VP had a strong team but was exceptionally bright. In meetings, he had a habit of asking a question, answering it himself, and then offering suggestions before anyone else could chime in. He was quicker than the others, but essentially, he was having a meeting with himself.

An organizational consultant suggested a simple fix: Have him take the meeting notes. Though he was tech-savvy, he used a notebook and pen. The act of focusing on this technical task kept him from dominating the discussion and gave others the space to contribute.

As a result, meetings ran a little longer, but the range of ideas expanded, and the team became far more engaged and collaborative.

Focused and Flexible

Once your meetings are running smoothly, there’s another trap to avoid: the endless cycle of recurring meetings. It’s easy to slip into autopilot: “It’s Monday, 10 a.m., so let’s meet.” But without a pressing agenda, these sessions can devolve into halfhearted chatter.

A simple solution? Set an expiration date. When I schedule repeat meetings in my calendar, I never make them open-ended; I usually schedule ten repetitions. Then, when we hit the expiration date, we reevaluate if we need them at the same frequency or even altogether.

Weekly meetings with a staff member can vary — some weeks there’s barely enough material to fill the time, while other weeks there’s far too much to cover. To manage this, we maintain a running list throughout the week, with both of us adding items as they come up.

At the start of the meeting, we review the list together, prioritize what absolutely needs to be addressed, and if any major topics require more time than the meeting allows, we schedule a separate session to tackle those.

Even so, some of the most effective meetings are the ones that aren’t routine. I’m a big fan of ad hoc meetings that zero in on specific topics and include only those who truly need to be there. Such meetings are often focused, efficient, and practical.

Keep in mind that being invited to a meeting can feel a bit like being part of a club. If you call a meeting with nine out of ten staff members, how might that last person feel? Even in smaller groups — say, five out of ten — it’s worth recognizing that people notice who’s included and who isn’t.

Being thoughtful about inclusion doesn’t mean inviting everyone — it means ensuring that those who aren’t included understand why. A little clarity can prevent a lot of hurt.

Tasteful Teamwork

A little food can work wonders. A snack or treat has a way of softening the mood, breaking down rigidity, and reminding everyone that we’re all human. After all, it’s hard to argue when your mouth is full of Danish.

If you choose to bring in food, keep it low-key. A simple spread can do the trick without stealing focus — unless you’re aiming to make a statement, in which case, go for something a little more memorable. The key is balance: food should enhance the meeting, not overshadow it.

Timing Tactics

Timing is key to effective meetings. Herold suggests scheduling them at 11 a.m. — the golden hour before lunch when focus peaks. It’s a solid idea, but might not suit every office culture. The real key is aligning with your team’s rhythms.

If half your staff checks out by 4 p.m., avoid scheduling high-stakes decisions at 3:30. Likewise, if your team isn’t fully alert until 9:30 a.m., plan crucial meetings for 10, when everyone is ready to engage.

One timing tweak that’s made a big difference for me: avoid scheduling meetings that wrap up 30 minutes before the workday ends. Those leftover minutes are often swallowed by distractions since there’s not enough time to tackle any serious work.

Instead, I schedule meetings so they end just minutes before people clock out — or far earlier in the day.

We often default to scheduling meetings for an hour simply because it’s a nice, round number. But there’s a strong case to be made for 45-minute meetings. The shorter timeframe naturally encourages greater focus and efficiency. Plus, if your meetings are back-to-back, ending before the hour gives you a valuable window to process what was discussed at the first meeting before diving into the second.

Meetings designed to summarize accomplishments or plan ahead work best when scheduled at the right time in the week’s rhythm. End-of-week meetings provide a natural opportunity to reflect on progress, tie up loose ends, and set the stage for a fresh start. On the other hand, beginning-of-week meetings can establish priorities, align goals, and set a focused tone for the days ahead.

A meeting is a promise: a promise to show up, to contribute, and to create something together that’s bigger than what we could do alone. With the right planning, format, roles and timing, they can become the heartbeat of your organization.

 

(Originally featured in Mishpacha, Issue 1046)

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