This test… this is not what it’s really all about. This isn’t going to decide anything. It’s all been decided already

M

imi’s never seen the classroom so still. She can almost touch the tense silence as Mrs. Stern begins distributing the booklets.

The seminary test.

The sheaf of papers is huge, thick, heavy. Mimi turns hers over to write her name.

“Hatzlachah, girls. You can begin.”

Instead of opening to the first page though, Mimi puts her pen down.

Focus — and calm down. You need to calm down.

She takes a breath, forces herself to ignore the frantic scribbling all around.

You’ve done your best, you know what you know… and remember, Kayla’s been quizzing you on all this, you do know a lot. You’re gonna be okay. You’re gonna be okay.

Her breath is coming too fast. Her heart is racing, no matter how much she tries to calm down. Mimi puts her forehead in her hands. Her palms are wet.

This… is so big. Too big. My whole future depends on it. Seminary acceptances. Whether I’ll get to go to Israel after 12th grade. Shidduchim. Life.

Okay, this is going too far.