My friend's tzniyus standards seem to fall way below mine in the summer heat

Hi, my name is Chana.

Summer is around the corner, and I couldn’t be more relieved. This year has been a whirlwind of activity, and I’m excited for the chance to relax and take it easy. I decided not to get a summer job this year and to spend the next eight weeks enjoying the sunshine and hanging out with friends. At night, I’ll be tutoring children ranging from ages seven to nine. I’m looking forward to it, and I hope it works out that I enjoy myself and feel productive at the same time.

One thing I’ve always been grateful for is my ability to tolerate the summer heat. I know its’s hard for a lot of frum girls to be tzniyus in 90-degree weather, but thankfully, it’s not like that for me. I rarely feel overheated or need relief from the sun, and I’m not the sweating type, baruch Hashem. I have a friend who is, though. Her name is Leah, and every summer we have the uncomfortable awkwardness between us about the fact that her tzniyus standards seem to fall way below mine in the summer heat.

I really don’t want to seem judgmental. I try very hard to be dan l’chaf zechus. Her family is less frum than mine, and she has a lot of cousins who dress immodestly, so she’s surrounded by that kind of dress much more often than I am. But it becomes awkward when we hang out and other friends of mine see her lower standards. I never allude to the fact that sometimes I’m uncomfortable around her, but I think she feels it, and I hate that. I try very hard to pretend I don’t notice the changes in her clothing but occasionally, I’m human, and I slip. Like last summer, we were going to a barbeque at one of my cousins, and I invited her to come along. When she showed up, I was embarrassed by her dress.

I didn’t think my cousins would feel comfortable, so I tried to hint that she could borrow a dress from me if she wanted, and she got really insulted. She refused to come, and we had a very awkward silence between us for a couple of weeks.

I want to avoid incidents like that. I don’t want to insult her, ever. But I also can’t help that she makes me uncomfortable. Do you have any advice for me so I can handle this the right way?