Dr. Alexandra Friedman, a chassidish mother of ten in Monsey, graduated top of her class while never losing sight of what mattered most

A conversation with Dr. Alexandra Friedman feels like a regular schmooze with a busy mother juggling the dual responsibilities of a large family and work outside the home.

The difference between this conversation and a regular one is that Dr. Friedman was joining me via Zoom from her home in Florida, where her family just relocated as she begins her residency in pediatric medicine. This is after she graduated at the top of her class from Touro College of Osteopathic Medicine, winning the Judith Wible M.D. Scholarship for Visionary Women in Medicine. She accomplished all this as a mother of ten children, three of whom were born while she was in medical school, including a set of twins.

While she reminisces about some of the more memorable moments of her recent accomplishments, she smiles easily and often, exuding a sense of calm as she brushes the bangs of her short blonde sheitel out of her eyes.

“Because it was Touro, they had a kosher kitchen area for us,” she recalls. “That was very helpful because I’d spend eight hours a day there.”

“And it’s not like you could just pop back home and make yourself something to eat,” I add.

“Right. On exam days I’d leave my house at three in the morning, and some exams wouldn’t be done until 6 p.m., so I wouldn’t get home until seven. I’d have to pack breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks, because I was pregnant with twins at that time. I’d come in with my schoolbag and like two food bags.”

We’re both laughing at this point.

“Yeah, it was pretty intense, but it was really good to have that environment.”

An Early Inclination

Dr. Friedman’s love of science started young. Her seventh-grade biology teacher had previously taught at a community college, and he essentially took his college-level curriculum and taught it to his seventh-grade students. While it was initially overwhelming, she found the material enjoyable, and the class opened her eyes to cell biology.

“It was very interesting,” she recollects. “The whole world that’s inside of our bodies is truly miraculous. The complexity, the specificity of every protein, each molecule, and how it all comes together within the cell. It’s beautiful.”

She went on to major in pre-med at William and Mary College in Virginia and participated in a yearlong research fellowship at the National Institutes of Health with Dr. Esther Sternberg, an internationally recognized researcher known for her discoveries in the field of mind-body interaction in illness and healing. Dr. Sternberg became a mentor to Dr. Friedman, a relationship that continues to this day.

Dr. Friedman’s next step was attending medical school in Kansas City. At the same time, she was also exploring Judaism on a deeper level. “From a young age I was always wondering ‘Who made the world?’ ‘What is the world?’ ” she says. As a young adult, these questions became more focused. “In looking toward getting married and raising a family, I wanted to give my children something. I wanted to raise them with values, knowing the purpose of life.”