Well, I have the same thing to say to all of you:  Just you wait. Your smugness will disappear in one spectacular teenage tantrum. You can email me then at sorryijudgedyounowigetit@gmail.com. I promise to never hold it against you when it comes to shidduchim.

I’m so young, my teen tells me, that I’m, like, clueless about how to raise teenagers today. I’m so old, says my teen, that I have no idea what it means to be a teen today. Cardigans, babies, and sushi are all heaven. Sales, following rules, and school lunch are all socially off.  I’m too strict with my almost adults; I’m not strict enough with anyone else. Our suppers border on child neglect; the baby’s clothes are so random.

Our little boys don’t always match — it’s dysfunctional. The older girls sometimes do match — it’s so awkward. The house isn’t clean enough — it’s mortifying. I actually make them clean up after themselves — it’s abusive. Speaking of which, we don’t have enough cleaning help. And when we do have, it’s so annoying! There’s nothing to eat in this house, we must move, no way am I dating from here, how will you even marry me off?

And it happens earlier than you think. Just when you’re starting to think you have the parenting thing down pat, BOOM! Your cute, little kid becomes a teenager.  Back when my first was just starting to display symptoms of adolescence (it was probably at around age five — oldest children are advanced like that),  the more battle-weary warriors experienced parents promised me that this stage was just” temporary insanity.” In my naïveté, I thought that temporary meant six months. It’s now quite a few long years later…

But take heart. Things have been happening that have me thinking. Maybe there is a glimmer of light at the end of this long, drawn-out tunnel. She’s almost 18, and exhibiting short bursts of… Agreement! Maturity! Responsibility! There is hope.

She may yet become the type of adult I could be proud of. A capable, respectable, marriage-worthy young lady. A true role model to her younger sisters.

Her younger sisters.

Wait.

Her younger sisters.

One of which is turning …. thirteen next month.

(Originally featured in Family First, Issue 787)