t had always been my dream to make a shidduch. Till then my track record hovered somewhere between “pathetic” and “abysmal.”

“Hi, Mrs. Milberg? This is Leora Hammer. I’m calling about Kivi. My husband met him the other day at the cleaners. Is he dating yet?” I held my breath. There’s always a first time!

“Who do you have in mind?”

Was that a yes or a no?

“Her name is Rachel Summerman.” I launched into a description of Rachel’s fantastic qualities. “I can totally see them together!”

“She sounds lovely.”


“How tall is she?”

Why does it matter? “Five four.” Not too tall, not too short, you can’t argue with five four.

Mrs. Milberg hmmmed. “What else can you tell me?”

That she’s thin and beautiful and always looks, dresses, and acts perfect, and your son should totally go out with her, come on. “I can tell from the way she interacts with her students that she’d make a great wife and mother. She’s so nurturing and perceptive.” How can you resist that? And it’s true!

“Where did you say her mother is from?”

“Oh, um, actually, I’m not sure. I know her from camp, so…”

“I see.”

I should have prepared better. “I can find out,” I assured Mrs. Milberg.

“Are they related to the Summermans from Chicago?”

“Um, I don’t know that either, but it’s not such a common name, so…” Was it normal to suggest a shidduch without knowing these things? Did I do something wrong?

“And tell me, are there any health issues involved?”

Finally, a question I could answer. “No, as far as I know she’s in perfect health.”

“As far as you know…?”

Oh, gosh. “She’s in perfect health,” I repeated, as reassuringly as I could.

A tiny pause, like she wasn’t sure if she should believe me. “You understand why I’m asking. If there’s a medical issue, we need to know.”

“I do understand why you’re asking.” I did understand. “There is no medical issue that I’m aware of. You’re welcome to check further, of course.” Aaack, did I just kill this shidduch? Should I have said something else? I wasn’t trying to hide anything. I really didn’t know of any medical issue!

“Nowadays you hear so many stories, people hide information…”

“Well, of course that’s always wrong, but—”

“And Kivi is just starting to date, there’s no reason for him to get involved with…”

I’d been the first girl my husband had dated.

“I’m sure if it was your own son, you’d also want to know.”

(Excerpted from Family First, Issue 578)