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| Parshah |

Bless You

Although the brachah of the Kohanim doesn’t require the merit of mitzvos, it still requires something

 

“If you follow My chukim and observe My mitzvos and perform them” (Vayikra 26:3).

 

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here’s a fundamental question about Bircas Kohanim, which we’ll soon experience on Shavuos: When Kohanim give a brachah, it has the power to bring blessing and shemirah to Klal Yisrael. Is that blessing dependent on a person’s merits, or is it independent of his standing? Are the benefits of duchaning a free pass that you receive even if you don’t deserve it, or is duchaning a conduit that allows your merits to bring blessing? (Rabbi Yisrael Reisman, Shiurim on Chumash).

My father z’’l was a champion bentsher. According to the yekkish minhag, he bentshed all his kids Friday night, Shabbos day, and after Havdalah. And every time we went away overnight and every long-distance phone call and every momentous occasion. You get the picture. My mother, on the other hand, bentshed us when the spirit hit her. I follow her minhag.

In the first pasuk of this parshah, which says “If you… observe My mitzvos,” we find every letter of the alef-beis except for the letter samech. The letter samech, which has a gematria of 60, represents the 60 letters in duchaning. The lack of the samech shows us that the brachah of duchaning is independent of whether or not you do the mitzvos. Even if you don’t deserve it, Bircas Kohanim brings blessing.

I’ve bentshed my kids before they went on an overnight hike, the first day of the zeman, as they’ve gone into labor.

Because my brachos are of the more spontaneous sort, they’re accompanied by whatever emotion I’m feeling at the time: Wow, my little boy is starting yeshivah. Help, my daughter’s trekking through the woods at night! (I will not discuss my emotions as my daughter goes into labor.)

But always, as I place my hand on that child’s head, I’m overcome with love and gratitude that this child is mine to bless.

Let’s ask another question. Why do we duchan in Shemoneh Esreh? It’s a whole separate mitzvah — nothing to do with Shemoneh Esreh. And bnei Ashkenaz in chutz l’Aretz do it only in Mussaf of Yom Tov. Why is that?
We must understand that duchaning is fundamentally tied to the Avodah, the service done in the Beis Hamikdash. It is therefore found right after we discuss the service of korbanos in Mussaf. When you bring a korban, you thank Hashem, which is part of the service. That opens up the door for the Kohanim’s brachah.
So, although the brachah of the Kohanim doesn’t require the merit of mitzvos, it still requires something. It requires that a person be an oved Hashem, that he gives thanks to Hashem. A person needs to utilize the service of korbanos — which in our days, is fulfilled through Shemoneh Esreh — to forge a connection to Hashem. That’s why we only duchan in Shemoneh Esreh after we say the brachah of the Avodah, which represents korbanos, and the brachah of Modim, which represents thanks.
Bircas Kohanim only comes when somebody wants to serve Hashem because he’s so thankful for all Hashem gives him. His actions may be lacking, or he may not be learning or davening properly. But if his head is on straight, his hashkafos are on target, and he sees himself as someone who’s connected to Hashem for His service and for thanksgiving, then the door to brachah is open and the blessings flow forth.

At my oldest daughter’s chasunah, I was on automatic pilot. Things happened the way I spent hours planning them, or they didn’t and there was nothing I could do about it, but I wasn’t feeling anything. During the badeken, I got a bit misty-eyed, but I’ve cried a lot more at other badekens I’ve attended. Then my husband finished bentshing her and stepped back. That was my cue to fix her veil and prepare for the chuppah.

But I didn’t. Instead, I was filled with a tremendous need to bentsh her as well. This wasn’t part of the plan — it was a spontaneous urge. I laid my hands gently on her covered head, and as I began the words, I began to weep. Hashem, thank you so much for the blessing of this child. Please let her continue to have only Your blessings as she continues in life.

And then, knowing I’d done all that a parent can do, I stepped back and let go.

 

 (Originally featured in Family First, Issue 794)

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