Start off a year of blessing

Prepared for print by Faigy Peritzman

When eating the simanim on Rosh Hashanah night, I get confused when I should make ha’eitz. Most machzorim seem to have the apple and honey first, but shouldn’t it be the pomegranate, which is one of the Shivas Haminim?

There are different customs regarding the order of the simanim. If you don’t have a specific custom, here’s what to do: On the first night, ha’eitz is recited during the meal over the apple. The pomegranate and other Shivas Haminim fruits are not brought to the table until after the apple is eaten. On the second night, ha’eitz is recited right after Kiddush (before washing) on the fruit that you designated to be your shehecheyanu fruit. During the meal, ha’eitz is not repeated over the apple or any other fruit.

I arrived at shul right the brachos for Tekias Shofar, but I still heard all 30 tekios. Am I yotzei, or must I hear again?

You are yotzei, since missing out on the brachos doesn’t invalidate the mitzvah. But if time permits, recite the brachos yourself in an undertone, before the baal tokeia begins to blow. If there isn’t enough time, and you’re planning to stay for Mussaf, recite the brachos yourself before the tekios that are blown during Mussaf chazaras hashatz.

When I light candles on the second night of Rosh Hashanah, do I still say shehecheyanu even if the new fruit I bought is not in front of me? 

Bring the fruit you prepared to the table so that it’s present when you light candles. If the fruit isn’t available until your husband is ready to make Kiddush, then light your candles right before Kiddush, when the fruit is on the table. If you forgot to buy a new fruit (or a new outfit), and your minhag is to recite shehecheyanu at every Yom Tov candle-lighting, then you may do so now as well.

My daughter is in seminary this year. Can I bentsh her on Erev Yom Kippur over the phone?

Yes, you may. While most poskim rule that one cannot be motzi another person with an obligatory brachah over the phone — such as the brachah of Havdalah — bentshing children on Erev Yom Kippur is not an obligatory brachah, but merely a supplication to Hashem, which may be said over the phone.

Is it appropriate for me to bless my son-in-law on Erev Yom Kippur?

If both of you are comfortable, there’s nothing wrong with it, although I am not aware of any specific minhag to do so.

For medical reasons, I will be drinking shiurim this Yom Kippur. Do I say a new birchas shehakol every nine minutes?

No. After reciting shehakol the first time you take a drink, the brachah lasts as long as you don’t “terminate your drinking session,” which happens when you change your location, either by taking a walk outside or going to shul; or when you go to bed and sleep for at least half an hour.

As a single woman, what are my options  regarding fulfilling the mitzvah of daled minim?

Women are not obligated in the mitzvah of daled minim, as it’s a time-bound mitzvah from which women are exempt, similar to tzitzis or tefillin. Nevertheless, many women make an effort to fulfill this mitzvah despite being exempt, and they usually do so by using a family member’s or a neighbor’s daled minim. If you don’t have access to another person’s daled minim, you may buy your own set.

I’m making a huge barbecue on Chol Hamoed for our extended family. While I’m serving a large variety of meats and sides, there’s actually no mezonos or hamotzi. Can we still say the brachah of leishev b’succah?

Unless you serve bread (or products in the bread family, such as sweet mezonos rolls, croissants, or crackers, upon which you can be kovei’a seudah) you will not be able to recite leishev basuccah. The real question here is why you aren’t serving bread with such a lavish meal, especially one that’s being served on Chol Hamoed, when it’s a mitzvah l’chatchilah to have a bread seudah twice a day — once at night and once during the day of each day of Chol Hamoed.

If I won’t be in shul on Shemini Atzeres, when do I begin saying mashiv haruach?

Recite mashiv haruach when you daven Mussaf at home, as long as it’s after the time that Mussaf has been recited in the shul which you (or your husband or father) normally attend.

(Originally featured in Family First, Issue 758)